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                    <text>9MMU

mmem**

THE
i I'M"
i I i

OLD SCOTTISH TRAGICAL

BALLAD
OF

SIR JAMES THE ROSE
Of all the Scottish northern chiefs,
Of high' and warlike name,
The bravest was Sir James the Rose,
A knight of meikle fame.

DUNDEE
P

r

i

n

t

e

d

f o k J T H E

B O O K S E L L E R S .

K

•k

�SIR .TAMES

HUT

THE

ROSE.

JA3IO/HT HHTTO)* &lt;|JO
m
ill I the Scottish norihern chiefs,
.
.
&lt; &gt;f hisjfi . Mtirl warfikc name,
it \
— ;| w t £ sir James the Hose
A kifiuht of meifee i'iftne.1

i\

I
i

His growth wa&gt; like the youthful oak,
That crowns the mountain's brow,
And waving o'er his shoulders broad.
His locks of yellow flew.
#

••

Wide were hisjlmlds, his herds were large,
And large his flocks of sheep,
And numerous were his goats and deer,
Upon the mountains steep.
The chieftain of the good clan Rose,
A firm and warlike band,
Five hundred warriors drew the sword,
Beneath his high command.
In bloody fight thrice had he stood
Against the English keen,
Ere two and twenty opening springs
The blooming youth had seen.

,

The fair Matilda dear he loved—
A maid to beauty rare ;
Ev'n Margaret on the Scottish throne
Was never half so fair.
• T, ,
.. ,
|/f .

|

�Long had lie wooed, long she r e f u s e ,
With seeming scorn and pride ;
Yet oft her eyes confessed the love
Her fearful words denied.
A t length she blessed his well-tried love
Allowed his tender claim ;
She vowed to him her tender heart.
And owned an equal flame.
Her father. Buclian's cruel lord,
Their passion dis-approved ;
He bade her wed Sir John the G ramie,
And leave the youth she loved.
One night they met as they were wont,
Deep in a shady wood,
Where on the bank beside the burn,
A blooming saugh tree stood.
Concealed among the underwood
The crafty Donald lay,
The brother of Sir John the G ramie,
To watch what they might say.
When thus the maid began, My Sire
Our passion dis-approves,
He bids me wed Sir John the Gramme,
So here must end our loves.
•
My father's will must be obeyed,
Nought boots me to withstand,
Some fairer maid in beauty's bloom
Shall bless you with her hand.
Soon will Matilda be forgot,
And from thy mind effaced ;
But may that happiness be thine,
Which J can never taste,

�4
What do I hear! is this tliy vow ?
Sir James the Rose replied;
And will Matilda wed the Graeme,
Though sworn to be my bride ?
;": • , . iH
His sword shall sooner pierce my heart
Than reave me of thy charms—
And clasped her to his throbbing breast,
Fast locked within his arms.
1 spoke to try thy love, she said,
I'll ne'er wed man but thee ;
The grave shall be my bridal bed
If Graeme my husband be.
i
: ; -•
Then take, dear youth, this faithful kiss
In witness of my troth,
And every plague become my lot,
That day I break my oath—
They parted thus—the sun was let—
Up htfsty Donald flies.
And turn thee, turn thee, beardless youth,
He loud insulting cries.
Soon turned about the fearless chief,
And soon his sword he drew ;
For Donald's blade before his breast,
Had pierced his tartans through.
This for my brother's slighted love,
His wrongs sit on my arm—
Three paces back the youth retired,
And saved himself from harm.
Returning swift his sword he reared,
Fierce Donald's head above ; 0
And through the brain and crashing bone,
Hi» furioas weapon drove, 1

�Life issued at the wound—he fell
A lump of lifeless clay ;
So fall my foes, quoth valient Rose,
Aucl stat'ely strode away.
,(!'?»;:
i
U
Thro' the green wood iu hast he passed,
Urito Lord Buchan's hall,
Beneath Matilda's window stood;
A n d thus on her did c a l l : o I
. n tV»f&gt; oi 'vjl-.ntii i't Hi'l
Art thou asleep, Matilda dear ?
Awake my love awake;
Lehold thy lover waits without,
A long farewell to take.
Avi : n &gt;d) t-i'. !. hi - ! •/
For I have slain fierce Donald Graeme
His blood is.on my sword ;
A n d far, far distant are" my men,
Nor can defend their lord.
.-•jib rnifuuiii 0*10 out /ft
T o Skye I will direct my flight,
Where my brave brothers bide,
Ito raise the mighty- of the Isles,
T o combat 011 my side.
0 do not so the maid replied,
With me till morning stay : ' *
For dark and dreary 4s' the night,
And dangerous is the way.
i! .
All night I'll watch thee in the park,
My faithful page I'll send
In liase to raise the brave clan Rose,
Their master to defend,
•biSJjC::

j s

rj

U!

? •

It /

He laid him down beneath a bush,
And wrapped'liini in his plaid;
While trembling fop her lover's fate,
A t distance stood the maid.

�.6
Fwift ran the page o'er hill and dell,
Till in a lowly glen,
He met the furious Sir John Graeme
With twenty of his men.
Where goest thou little page, he said,
So late ? who did thee send ?
I go to raise the brave clan Rose,
Their master to defend.
For he has slain fierce Donald Graeme
His blood is on his sword,
And far, far distant are his men,
Nor can assist their lord.
And has he slain my brother dear ?
The furious chief replies ;
Dishonour blast my name but he
By me ere morning dies.
Say page where is Sir James the Ros« ?
J will thee well reward—
He sleeps into Lord Buclian's park,
Matilda is his guard.
They spurred their steeds and furious flew
Like lightening o'er the lea ;
They reached Lord Buchan's lofty tower
By dawning of the day.
Matilda stood without the gate,
Upon a rising ground,
And watched each object in the dawn,
All ear to every sound.
Where sleeps the Rose? began the Grame
Or has the felon fled ?
This hand shall lay the wretch on earth,
Uy whom my brother bled,

A

�7
Last day at noon, Matilda said,
Sir James the Ro-e passed by.
Well mounted on his noble steed,
And onward fast did hie.
By this time he's in Edinburgh Town,
If horse and man hold good ;—
Tour page then lied who said he was
Now sleeping in the wood.
She wrung her hands, and tore her hair
Brave Rose thou art betrayed.
And ruined by tlio.e very means'
From whence 1 hoped thine aid.
And now the valiant knight awoke,
The virgin shrieking heard ;
Straight up he rose and drew his sword,
When the fierce band appeared.
Your sword last night my brother slew,
His blood yet dims its shine;
And ere the Sun shall gild the morn,
Your blood shall reek on mine.
Your words are brave, the chief returned,
But deeds approve the man,
Set by your men and hand to hand
We'll try what valour can.
With dauntless step he forward strode,
And dared him to the fight;
The Graeme gave back, he feared his arm
For well he knew his might.
Four of his men, the bravest four,
Sunk down beneath his sword ;
But still he scorned the poor revenge.
And sought their haughty lord.

�a -'
Behind him basely came the Graeme,
And pierced him in the side ;
Out sprouting came the purple stream,
And all his tartans dyed.
But yet his hand dropped not the sword,
Nor sunk he to the ground,
Till through his enemy's heart the steel,
Had forced a mortal wo and.
Grseme, like a tree by wind o'er thrown,
Fell breathless on the clay ;
And down beside him sunk the Rose,
And faint and dying lay.
Matilda saw and fast she ran,
O spare his life, she cried;
Lord Buchan's daughter begs his life,
Let her not be denied.
Her well-known voice the hero heard,
And raised his death closed eyes,
He fixed them on the weeping maid,
And weakly this replies :
In vain Matilda begs a life,
By deaths arrest denied ;
My race is run—adieu, my love •
Then closed his eyes and died.
The sword yet warm from his left side,
With frantic hand she drew ;
I come, Sir James the Rose, she cried,
I come to follow you.
The hilt she leant against the ground,
And bared her snowy breast,
Then fell upon her lovers face,
And sunk to endless rest.

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                <text>&lt;a title="University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks" href="http://special.lib.gla.ac.uk/chapbooks/search/"&gt;University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks&amp;nbsp;&lt;/a&gt;</text>
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                    <text>SBVJBN

JOCK 0 ' HAZELDEAN.
THIS IS NO MY AIN LASSIE.
LOGAN WATER.
BANKS OF ALLAN WATER.
SOMEBODY.
T H E Y ' R E A' TEASING ME.
TO ALL YOU LADIES.

GLASGOW:
PRINTED FOR THE BOOKSELLERS.

�SONG'S

JOCK 0 \ H A Z E u m m .
4iWfiy

weep ye by the1 title, lady?
Why w.epp ye by .the tide ?
M -ared'ye-to my youngest Sony
And rye (shall be his bride,.
And ye shall be his bride, lady,
Sa© comely to be seen :"
But aye she loot the tears clown fa*
¥w Jock o? Hazeldean.
" Mow let this wilful grief be done,
And dry that cheek so pale ;
Young Frank.is chief of Errington,
And Lord of Langley dale.
His,.step-is-first in peaceful ha5, .
His sword in ; battle keen
But sjjr ihe loot the tears down fa?
Wm lock o' Hazeldean.
A ciiaxn 4f gold ye shall not lack,
JSfor braid to bind .your hair,
Nor mettl'd hound, nor managed hawk,
Nor palfrey fresh an d fair.
si

�3
And you the foremost o' them a*
Shall ride, our foremost queen :&gt;r
But aye she loot the:tears down fa*
For Jock o' Hazeldean.
The kirk w&amp;s cleck'd at morning tide,,
The tapers glimmer'd fair,
The priest and bridegroom, wait the Bride*
And dame and knight are there.
%
They sought her baith by bower and
The lady was not seen ;
She's o'er the border and awa,
"Wi' Jock o' Ilazeldean.

THIS IS NO MY AI1SF LASSIE.
This is ho my ain lassie,
Fair though the lassie be ;
0 well ken I mine ain lassie,
Kind lore is in her. ee.
I see a form, I see a face,
Ye weel may wi' the fairest place;
It wants to me the witching grace,
The kind love that's in her ee.
0 this is no, &amp;c.
She's bonny, blooming, fresh and tall,
And lang has had my heart: in thrall,
And aye it charms my very sauI;
The kind love that's in her ee.
0 this is no, &amp;c.

�4
A tliief sae pawkie is my Jean,
To steal a blink by a' unseen ;
But gleg as light are lovers' een,
When kind love is in the ee.
0 this is no, &amp;c.
It may escape the courtly sparks.
It may escape the learned clerks ;
But weel the watching lover marks
The kind love that's in her ee
0 this is no, &amp;e.

SOMEBODY.
My heart is lair, I darena tell,
My heart is sair for somebody,
I could wake a winter night,
For the sake o' somebody.
Och hon, for somebody !
Och hey, for somebody
I could range the world around,
For the sake o' somebody.
Ye pow'rs that smile on virtuous lov
0, sweetly smile on somebody :
Frae ilka clanger keep him free,
And send me safe my somebody
Och hon, for somebodj 1
Och hey, for somebody I
1 wad do, what wad I not,
For the sake o' somebody

�LOGAN W A T E R .
O Logan, sweetly didst thou glide,
That day I was my Willie's bride:
And years sinsyne hae o'er us run,
Like Logan to the summer sun. |
But now thy flow'ry banks appear
Like drumlie winter, dark and drear,
While my dear lad maun face his &amp;tes,
Far far frae me and Logan braes.
Again the merry month of May,
Has made our hills and valleys gay,
The birds rejoice in leafy bowers,
The bees hum round the breathing flowers
Blythe morning lifts his rosy eye,
And evening tears are tears of joy ;
My soul, delightless, a' surveys,
While Willie's far frae Logan braes.
Within yon milk-white hawthorn bush,
Amang her nestlings sits the thrush,
Her faithfu' mate will share her toil,
Or wi' his song her cares beguile ; J j
But I wi' my sweet nurslings here,
Nae mate to help, nae mate to cheer,
Pass widow'd nights and joyless days,
While Willie's far frae Logan braes.
O, wae upon you men o' state,
That brethren rouse to deadly hate!
As ye make mony a fond heart mourn,
Sae may it on your heads return.

�6
How can your flinty hearts enjoy,
The widow's tear, the orphan's cry?
But soon may peace bring happy^ days,
And Willie frame to Logan braes !
BANKS OF A L L A N WATER.
On the banks of Allan water,
When the sweet spring time did fall,
Was the miller's lovely daughter,
Fairest of-, them, all.
For h;s bride a soldier sought Iier,
And a winning tongue had Be ;
On the banks of Allan water,
None so gay as she.
Oil the banks of Allan water,
When brown autumn spreads his store,
There I saw the miller's daughter;
But she smiled no more.
For the summer grief had; brought her,
And her soldier false was he :
On the banks of Allkn water,
None so sad as she&lt;
On the banks of Allan water,
When the winter snow fell fast.
Still was seen the miller's daughter,
Chilling blew the blast.
But the miller's lovely daughter,
Both from cold and care was free—
Qm the banks of Allan water,
.There a corse lay she.

�7
THEY'RE A' TEASING ME.
0 wha-islie I loe sae weel?
Wha was my heart an'a;*,
(3 wha as 'he ? 'tis mir to 'tell
He's o'er'the seasawa',
There's Charlie he'sa sodger lad,
And. Davie'Myfhe is he,
And Willie in his tartan plaid,
They're a'teasing me.
0 they're a' tease teasing,
They're a' teasing me.
They're a' tease teasing,
0 they're a teasing me.
There VGarl fe chief o' Daftue glen,
&lt; And he has land and store,
With flowfrymead, and shady fen,
And siller o'er and o'er.
irry thee
And thou my ain true bride shall be,
AncI Queen o' Daftne ha !!?
0 they 're .a' tease, &amp;c.
But irhen my Jamie comes again,
Young1 Carl will then descry,
That siller is but Jempty gain,
To hearts nae gowcl can buy,
My Jamie's brave,, my Jamie's braw,
My Jamie's a' to nie,
And tho' his siller store be sma'
1 1
Yet his I ' "

�TO ALL YOU LADIES,
To all you laclies now at land,
We men at sea indite,
But first would have you understand
TIow hard it is to write.
The Muses now, and Neptune too,
We must implore to write to you,
1T0 write to you,
With a fal, lal, lal, la, la, la, la,
With a fa
With a fa, &amp;c.
Injustice you cannot refuse
To think of our distress,
When we, for hopes of honour, lose
Our certain happiness ;
All these designs are but to prove
Ourselves more worthy of your love,
More worthy of your love.
With a fal, &amp;c.
Arid now we've told you all our loves,
And likewise all our fears ;
In hopes this declaration moves
Some pity for our tears ;
Let's hear of no inconstancy,
We have enough of that at sea,
Of that at sea.
With a fal, &amp;c,

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                  <text>Woodcut 082: Title-page illustration of  a young woman carrying a basket and balancing a bird cage on her head. Outdoor scene.</text>
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                <text>Seven Sentimental Songs. Jock O' Hazeldean. This is no my ain Lassie. Logan Water. Banks of Allan Water. Somebody. They're a ' Teasing Me. To all you ladies.</text>
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                <text>&lt;p dir="ltr"&gt;&lt;span&gt;&lt;a title="University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks" href="http://special.lib.gla.ac.uk/chapbooks/search/"&gt;University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;</text>
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                <text>To all you ladies.</text>
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                    <text>�r
THE UlSI'QRIc

i*

4

,;

WILL
%

,

i

%

AN®
.so

v

s
J
J E A N .

j

*

•

$

TO B T p a i a a . d A B &amp;HT
like Willie
$ WHA wasinanceb o u r i n g tow^iGairlace, Wha
la
B eap t ^ s* plow n: \v afe in 1 i 3 fair "face, 1 C
&gt;
%
Deadly strength was in iiis arm.

f
|
f

* ^^ .

Wlia wi* Will could riii or wrastle,
Throw the sledge d#t!&gt;ssf tgie bar,
4&gt;
C Hap what would* he stood a castle,
Or for safety or for Wa?.

#
%

%

v^ll
C W a r m his he ait/ and mild as tnarifu,
^
W i ' the hauld he bauld could be 5
\ But to friends wha had {ftfjjjjbhldfii} %
f,
Purse ^tid service aye-war free*
W h a n he first saw JedhJfe Miller,
W h a wi* leaftie could compare ? *
Tliousands had.maiE braws and siller,
B u t was ony half so Talr ?
Kind and gentle wWiiQf naiitfe ;
&amp;
A t jlk |}lace she kjre the bell, 1 Vi
if Sic a bloom, and shape, and stature !
B u t her look nae tongue can tell J

S

F\
&lt;||

1
S
•f
1
:m

M
M
&lt;$.; ^

i

�Sic was Jean, { whan \\ r ill first Flawing
Spied her 16ri a 'piillwartl Inwig^
Flew like fire, and, just when fa'irig.
Kept her on his manly breast.
Light he fe^Wpf,' ^ a l ^ a ^ a ^ ^ ^ i ^ Q
Cross the meadow fragrant, green, t ;
Placed her on the new mowai rashgs*Watching sad Her opening eert.
(

!

Sic was Will, &gt;vheit poor .Teanf |§}$iij»g*
Drap into a lover's arms; ,, ' ,
.
Wakened to his £aft lamenting,
-f, &gt;
Sighed and Unshed a thousand charms.
Soon they loo'd, and soon was hucldeA
Nane took tirne to think and rue;
Ytm^l and wqrth, and beaufcy&gt; coupled,
had titter l e s s \ o do.
r
r r„
hellevin) yeib nO.

Thre^^Hcirt yfcahf flew by fu' cautf^ ;

Jeaif* arid Will 'thought then! biit ane;;
Hkh day brought joy and pleijLty, ,t , |
Ilka year a daitity wean.
Will wrought sair, but aye wi? pleasure ;
Jean the hale day span and sang *
;
Will atid weans her constant treasure,
Blest wi' them, nae day seemed lang.
•
, .. , z'sJv/ # otwod B fll
Trig her house, and 0I11 to busk. aye;
Hk sweet bairri was A?fyerpride* ^
But at this time N E W S and W H l § K Y
Sprang iiafc tip at ilk road side.

�4
Luckless was the hour whan Willie.
Hame returning frae the fair,
O'ertook Tam, a neebour billie,
Sax miles frae their hame and mair
Simmer's heat had lost its fury;
Calmly smiled the sober e'en,
Lasses on the bleachfield hurry,
Skelping barefit owre the green :
Labour rang wi* laugh and clatter,
Canty hairst was just begun,
And on mountain, tree, and water,
Gljnted saft the setting sun.
1
•&amp;nru.i/•'• '
'
Will and Tam, wi' hearts a' louping,
Mark't the hale, but could nae bide;
F a r frae hame, nae time for sioppiiig,—Baith wished for their ain R e side,
On they travelled, warm and drouthy,
Cracking owre the npws in town ;
The mair they crack't, the mair ilk youth aye
Prayed for drink to &gt;V£sJti. news do Wit.
Fortune, wha but seldom listens
, XtPftdcte M&amp;x:ft?'s modest prayer^
And on foofe pofirs needless blessings,
Hearkened to our drouthy pair.
In a howm, wha's bonny burmg. | 10X[ &lt;oWf
Whimpering rQwed its crystal flood^f]]
Near the road wliW travellers turn aye,
Neat and biejd a cot-house stood j ^ v

�5
White the wa's wi' roof new theekit,
Window broads just painted red ;
Lown 'mang trees and braes it reekit,
Haflins seen and haflins hid.
Down below a flowery meadow
Joined the burnie's winding line
Here it was that H O W E the widow
That same day set up her sign.^
Brattling down the brae, and near its
Bo t to in, Will first marvelling sees,
" PORTER, A L E , &amp; BRITISH S P I R I T S , "

Painted bright between twa treesi
Huzza, Taii}iI here's walth for drinking:
W h a can this new comer be ?
Hout, quo Tam, there's drouth in: thinking,
Let's in, Will, and syne we'll see.
Nae mair time they tool? to speak or
Think of ought but reaming jugs,
Till three times in humming liquor,
Ilk lad deeply laid his lugs.
Slockened now, refreshed and talking,
In cam Meg (weel skilled to please),
Sirs, ye're surely tired wi"' walking,
Ye maun taste my bread and cheese.
Thanks, quo Will, I canna tarry,
Pick-mirk night is setting in ;
Jean, p'uir thing's her lane and eery—
I maun to the road and riu.

�6
Haat, quo Tam, what's a* the huttfyK
Hame's npw scarce a mile of gate—
Come, sit down, Jean winna wearier
Hout, I'm sura it's no sae late
Will owrecjtfiafc wif Tairi's oration
Baith fell ibo and ate their fill;
Tam,vq.uO Will, in mere discreti^ii^
W e inan® Hae th&amp;. widfew'g giBi ^
After ae gill cam aiiither—
fil 1 ^
Meg sati cracking 'tween th^fl Cwa;
Bang- cam; m Mat Smith arfd's Mihe^,^
Geqrdie Brawn and Sandib ^Sti&amp;w.
:N^ebt&gt;urs

whs ne'er thotighfrni&amp;Im^hfere,
Now skt dawn wi' ckuMe flee,
Hfc gUL aye grehv • s week and sweeter, f 0 5 i
Will gat hame 'tweeft W a
tferee.

Jean, piiir fhing/ Wd lang^ Been greeting;
Will, niest morning blathed Tan* Lowes,
1
But ere langan owkly Meeting 0
W a s set ap at M%gle f 5SbWe^.
Maist things hae a sma "beginning,
B u t wfia kens how things ^ill end ?
Owkly cliiJis are nae great sinning,
a
Giu folk' hae enough to spend.
But nae man of sober thinking
E'er will say that things' can thrive,
If there's spent in owkly drinking
W h a t keeps wife and weans alive.

�Drir&amp; maun, aye hae conversation, ' v
ffia social r«»-:l allocs; V
' .,
M t to this reforming nation"
, 5 "
^ W f f i r a i P p a i r without; M W l f r s ?
MaggV£

te^fe!

bouji1 M iial i i p f

Potind ere Jang the fault," and ae night
.awe CMli l &lt;f a n d g a t the W ^ M i M r

1
S # f
t
1'iy
N o u g h t s spring up like plants i r i ^ l i o u s e
iLtety time tne news are read.

Ilk a n ^ H f BVin
"Jn.'!
Things are no gaun riglit, quo Tain,
&gt; Let lis aitener meet thegither,.
Twice % owk's iio worth ilie gauri
ri
. i •: .. sift
raid wu3
t
bee jthenVnow in grave convenfjvn,^
To make a'" things Square and t ven,
Or r 4t least wi' firm intpntiqn V .ryf
To drint sii1 nights out o' seven. "
'Mid this sitting up and dxinking.
Gathering a' the news:that fell,
^Till, wlia ^Tasna yet
5
H a d some Battles w t hirn sel. y

4

Oti ae liandi Jnnk's: deadly poison".
Bare ilk firm resolve awa ;
j * j ~;.,
On the ither, Jean's condition
'
Rave his very heart in twa.

�8
W e e l he saw her smothered sorrow ;
Weel he saw her bleaching cheek l
Marked the smile he strave to borrow,
W h a n , puir thing, she couldna speak.
Jean, at first took little head o*
Owkly clubs 'mang three or four,
Thought, kind soul, that Will had need o*
Heartsome hours when wark was owre.
B u t whan now that nightly meetings*
Sat and drank frae sax till twa, ;
W h e n she found that hard earned gettings
Now on drink war thrown awa;
Saw her Will,'wha ance sae cheery
Raise ilk morning wi' the lark,
Now grown mauchless, dowf, and swear aye
To look near his farm or wark;
Saw him tyne his manly spirit,
Healthy bloom and sprightly e'e ;
And of love and hairie grown wearit,
Nightly frap his family flee;
W h a could blame her heart's complaining ;
W h a condemn her sorrows meek,
Or the tears that now ilk evening
Bleached her lately, crimsoned cheek ?
W i l l , wha lang had rued and swithered*
( A y e ashamed of past disgrace) ;
Marked the roses as they withered
Fast on J eanie's lovely face.

�Marked, and felt wi1 inward racking
A ' the wyte lay wi' himsel,
Swore neist night he'd mak a breaking—•
D—d the club and news to hell I
But alas ! when habit's rooted
Few hae pitli the root to p u ' ;
Will's resolves were aye nonsuited,-—
Promised aye—but aye gat f u \
Aye at first at the convening
Moralized on what was right;
Yet on clavers entertaining
D m d and drank till broad day-light.
•

Things at length drew near an ending
C*sh rins out—Jean quite unhappy,
Sees that Will is now past mending
Tynes a* heart, and taks a drappy.
Jean, wha lately bare affliction
W i ' sae meek and mild an air,
Schooled by whisky, learns new tricks soon,
Flytes, and storms, and rugs Will's hair,
Jean, sae late the tenderest mither,
Forid of ilk dear dauted wean ;
Now heart-hardened athegither,
Skelps them round frae morn till e'en.
Jean, wha, vogie, locked to busk aye
In her hame-spun, thrifty wark,
Now sells a her braws for whisky,
To her last gown, coat, and sark*

�10
B a i t y Bam^j in mony a ditty*
toudly sings in whisky's prain $
jSyeet his sang—the mair's die pity
"©er on it he wared sic lays.
Of a' the ills poor Caledonia
Ever preed or e'er will taste,
Brewed in hell's black Pan demon ia,
Whisky's ill will skaith her maist.
See them now ! how changed wi' drinMng
A' their youthful beauty gane I
Davered, doited, daized, and blinking,
Worn to perfect skin and bane I
In the cauld month of IvT«vember,
"
( C i a ^ , ^ili cash, jind credit'put,)
Cowering owre a dying ember,
Wi* ilk face as white's a clouti ? I
Bond, and bill, and debts a' stoppit,
Ilka sheaf selt on the tent,
(]^ttle, |ieds, and hlankits roupit
Now, to pay the laird his rent.
No anitlier night to lodge here,
N o a friend their cause to plead J •
l i e taen on to be a sodger,
- ^ wo'M
0fis yn w a n s to beg h©r br*i&amp;

�Gil

THE # £ I I O T OF THE
• t Sandbar!- ? • ••

' •&gt; •
&lt;•

HISTORY
. &gt;YN; i

OH ! t h a t folk wad weel consider
W f i a t it is to tyne a riaine?
W h a t - t h i s warrs^athegither,
If bereft of honest fame!
Poortith ne'er can bring dishonour
. ^Hardships ne'er breed; sorrows sinart,
' I f bright conscience taks upon Jter
T o shed sunshiny round the heart.
B u t wi' a' that walth can borro w5
Guilty gliarae will
look dpvyn ;
W h a t maun then shame, want, ami sorrow
Wandering sad frae town to town!
Jeani^ Miller, ance sae cjieerie,
i^nce sae happy, gnid, audjVir,
Lpft by Will, neist morning djrourie
T a k s the road of black despair;
Cauld the blast, the day was sleeting,
. Pouch and purse without a plaek,
In ilk hand a bairnie greeting,
And, the third tied on her back
W a n hei;faq§i~ and lean apd haggard J
Anpe §ae aonsiej ance gae ^weetl/
W h | t ix change !—unhpi^ed
beggared
^ I r r y i n g ^ v i t l i q i i t : claise or

�12
F a r frae ilk kent spot she wandered,
Skulking llVe a guilty thief;
Here and there uncertain daundered,
Stupified wi' shame and grief.
B u t soon shame for bygane errors,
Fled owre fast for e'e to trace,
"Whan grim death, wi' a his terrors,
Cam owre ilk sweet bairnie's face.
Spent wi' toil, and cauld, and hunger,
Baith down drapt, and down Jean s a t !
Daized and doited now nae langer
Thought and felt, hut bursting grafc.
Gloaming fast wiVmirky shadow
Crap owre distant hill and plain;
Darkened wood, and glen, and meadow,
Adding fearful thoughts to pain.
Round and round, in wild distraction,
Jeanie turned her tearful e'e
Round and round for some protection !
Face nor house she couldna see.
Dark and darker grew the night aye,
Loud and sair the cauld winds thud $
Jean now spied a sma bit lightie
Blinking through a distant wood.
Up wi frantic haste she started,
Cauld nor fear she felt nae mair $
Hope, for ae bright moment, darted
Through the gloom of dark despair.

�13
Fast owre fallowed lea she brattled,;
Deep she wade through bog and burn,
Sair wi' steep and craig she battled,
Till she reached the hoped sojourn
Proud 'mang scenes of Simple Nature,
Stately, auld, a mansion stood
On a bank, whase sylvan feature,''1
Smiled out ower the roaring flood.
Simmer here, in varied beauty,
Late her flowery man tie spread,
W h a r auld chesnut, ake and yew tree
Mingling, lent their friendly shade.
Blasted now wi' W i n t e r s ravage,
A' their gaudy livery cast,
Wood and glen in' waitings'"savage.
Sung and howled to ilka blast.
Darkness stalked wi' fancy terror,
Mountains moved and castle rocked,
Jean, half dead wi' toil and horror/
Reached the door and loudly knocked
W h a thus rudely waks the sleeping?
Cried a voice wi' angry grane;
Help I oh help ! quo Jeanie, weeping,
Help my infants or they're garie.
Nipt wi' cauld, wi' hunger fainting,
Baith lay speechless on the lea !
Help ! quo Jeanie, loud lamenting,
Help my lammies, or they'll die.

�14
travels cauld and hungry,
- W*' JOIMS faints sae late at jB'ew ?
Beggars, cried the voice niair angry,
l^eggeirs wi' their brats I ween.
Beggars.np.w^.alasJ. wji^ lM^y-,
' Helpt the beggar and the poor;
Fye, gu(Jem,an, cried ane discreetly,
Tauiit, na poorti th at the door,
Sic a night and tale thegither
Plead for mair than anger's din;
Rise Jock, cried the pitying mither,
Rise and let the wretched in.
Beggar now, alas ! wha lately
Helpt the beggar and the poor i
Enter, ^uo the yonth^discreetly,
While up i flew the open dao£f
Beggar, or what else, sad mourner.
Enter without fear or dread ;
Here, thank, God, there's aye a cornep
r Tp defend the houseless head.
For your bairnies cease repining ; v fX:\'/f
I f fti life ye'11 see, them soon ;
A ff he flew ; and brightly shin ing
Through (fie da^k clouds, brak the moon.
Here, for ae night's kind protection, t
Leave Sye Jean and weans awhUe,
Tracing Will iri| ilk direction,
F a r fnie Britain's fostering isle..

,

�Ip
Far frae scenes of fastening,pleasure,
LtiVe's delights and beauty's jcHarj^ p*
Far frae^ friendship's social leisure,
^T^lunged in murdering W A l l ' s alarms.
Is it nature, vice, or folly,
Or ambition's feverish brain,
That sae aft, wi' melancholy,
Turns, sweet P E A C E ! thy joys tip fain.
That wi! a' thy charms enticing
rf
• ^To the e'e and to the heart,
(Ilk Endearing bliss despising),
TMn^ts weak man frae .tMetopart.• flfiJi-J Or'! ti •
-J no.
Willie Gairlace, without siller,
Credit, clase, or ought beside,
^eaves lift ance loved Jeanie "Millejr, [
bairns to warld wide.,' ;
Leaves his native cozy dwelling,
Sheltered haughs and birken braes,
Grreeniwaird howes and dainty mailing
Ance his prdflt/ pride, and praife§.:

4

Decked wi' ,scarlet, sword, and musket,
D r u n ^ y ? dreams ft s fause its vkiii^"'
Fleeclied "and flittered, roosed anfl biislnt,
W\5W but T Will was \vondrous fain,
JI T M'PPL V U ?•/ &gt;!ooi ,00-/1
Rattling, roaring, swearing, drinking,
How cotdd Thought her stMdn keep;**
Drams and '^rufoiifihg' (fees to'thinkihjbr))rv
Dnied Reflection fast asleep.

�16
Bmt when shipt to toils and dangers,
W i ' the cauld grund for his b e d Compassed round wi'faes and stranger%
Soon Will's dreams of fancy fled.
Led to battle's blood-dyed banners
Waving to the widow's moan,
W i l l saw Glory's boasted honours
End in life's expiring groan.
Round Valenciennes' strong walled City*
Thick owre Dunkirk's fatal plain.
W i l l (though dauntless) saw wi' pity,
Britain's valiant sons lie slain.
Fired by freedom's burning fever,
Gallia's rack Death's slaughtering knell,
Frae the Scheldt to Rhine's deep, river,
Britons fought—but Britons fell.
Fell unaided, though cemented
By the faith of friendship's laws j
Fell unpitied ! unlamented I
Bluiding in a thankless cause.
In the thrang of comrades deeing,
Fighting foremost of them a',
Swith ! Fate's winged ball cam fleeing,
And took Willie's leg in twa.
Thrice frae aff the grund he started,
Thrice to stand he strave in vain,
Thrice, as fainting strength departed,
Sighed—and sank 'mid heaps of slain,

�17
Erskine, wha ne'er slighted merit,
Marked him 'mid the bloody fray ;
Save that gallant daring spirit, 1
Twice he saved my life the day, *
fast on battle raging,.
T ed our stalwart youths awa,
Day by day new faes engaging,
Forced the weary back to fa'.
Driven at last frae post to pillar,
Left by friends wha ne'er proved true.
Tricked by knaves wha poucliecl our siller,
.J^fJiat could worn-out valour do ?
Myriads 4ark, Jike gathering thunder,Bursting, spread owre land and sea ;
Left alane&gt; alas ! nae wonder
Britain's sons were forced to flee.
* V

C. ' °" ' '

'• •

Cross the W a r e and (Yssel frozen,
.Deqp through bogs and drifted snaw,
Wounded, weak, and spent, our chosen
Gallant men now faint and fa.
On, a cart wi5 comrades bluiding,
. j
Stiff wi' gore, and cauJd as clay,
Without cover, bed, or bedding,
•
Five lang nights W i l l Gairlace lay.
In a sick-house, damp and rianuw,
(Left behind, wi' hundred mair,)
See W i l l neist, in pain and sorrow,
Wasting on a bed of care.

�Ite
Wounds, arid paiii^ and; til;
Doctors curo«I wi' healing art
Cured, alas ! but never, never,
Cooled the fever at his hearts
For, whan a' war sound and sleopihgV'
Still and on, baith ear and lafc,
Will in briny grief lay steeping,
'U
Mourning owre liS hapless" M e . *
A ' liis gowden prospects vanished,
A fek'U^a^a / l ^ ^ d ^ A ^ t ^ i Jiewl
. liio g!Aii/i/Oii-iit? jjiianLum^ uaxiioiiuu, h T
Will^btild 1 tlifrik of ndi^Kt btWWme.

' Kural labour, rural ploys ;
F a r frae carnage, bluid, and riot, ;
n
W a r , arid m 2 i
i

a

Back to Britain's fertile garden,
'
• Will's returned (exchanged for fires),
Wi 5 ae leg, and no a farden,
Friend or creffit; nieat cHr claiseV U f '
Lang through country, burgh, and city
Crippling on a wooden leg,
Gathering alms frae melting pity,
See poor'Gairkce forced to beg.J
Placed at length on Chelsea's bounty,
Now" to lariger beg Uiinfcs sh^iji^, } .
Dreams' anee mair of smiling plenty,
Dreams of former joys, and liifeffe/ *

�W
H a m e r a h d &amp; its fond attractions,
Fast to Will's warm ljo^om fleer f
Wliild; the though is of deflr eonpeetio^ ^
Swell "his feart and' Wmd his t ^ M ^
Monste¥-P wha cMd ] ike ne?p&amp;£eif
Tkree stoa' infants and &amp; Wffe/\ ; ? n a J
Naked, starving, unprotected,
"iko'l
8VS
Them too 'dearer airee than
&lt;2
Villain! w h k ^ P g r a c e s

11

Changed1 hek*'FFIFFTCR^elailcholy^ M 1
Reggar y^ ^ - ^ j f e M i $ $ $
JB
Starting;
flikrdti&amp;ftj'1
Crushed w i ' " g r i e F ^ e r t t ^ l b a y p
Up h e B a n g e d / d ^ ^ ^ m ^ t e S ^ 7 ^
Sad and siletft

Sometimes briskly, sometimes flaggin '
Sometimes helpit/ Will gat-forth, - \
On a carl' 6r iii a Waggon / ^ ' hsfmno^/
Hirplin^ ayfet$#ards th&amp; - ii cMli.
Tired at ^eniri^/ ifefprping h M y , ; i r ; G s '
Pondering oh Ms thra^ard fate, '
:
In the boiiiiy : month-rf July, 1 ; :
^
&lt;;
"Willie,
'
Aft the southland b r e e z e W a w i i i g , *7
SwTeetly si
ghecHhe green ake'Vood,
Loud the din of streams fast fd'ifig,
Strack the ear wi* thundering thud;

�20
Ewes and lambs on braes ran bleating,
Linties sang on ilka tree,
Frae the west the sun, near setting,
Flamed on Roslin's towers sae hie.
Roslin's toners and braes sae bonny,
Craigs and water, woods and glen,
Roslin's Ibanks ! unpeered by ony,
Save the muse's Hawthorn den.
Ilka sound and charm delighting,
Will (though hardly fit to gang,),
Wandered onfthrough scenes inviting,
Listening to the mavis' sang.
Faint at length, the day fast closing,
On- a fragrant strawberry steep,
Esk s sweet strea.ni to rest composing,
Wearied ^ f a t u r e drapt asleep.
Soldier, rise ! the dews of e'ening
Gathering, fa' wi' deadly skaith I
Wounded soldier ! if complaining
Sleep nae here to catch your death.
Traveller, waken !-—night advancing,
- Cleeds wi' gray the neebouring hill;
Lambs nae mair on knowes are dancing
A ' the woods are mute and still.
W h a t hae
cried Willie, waking,
W h a t hae I frae night to dree P
Morn, through clouds in splendour breaking
Light's nae brightning hope to me.

�21
House nor hame, nor farm nor steading,
Wife nor bairns hae I to see,
House nor hame, nor bed nor bedding, )
W h a t hae I frae night to dree ?
Sair, alas ! and sad arid pianyv
Are the ills poor mortals share,
Yet, though hame nor bed ye hae nae,
Yield nae, Soldier, to despair.
What's this
If Hope's
See, though
Yon sma-

life, sae vvae and weatie,
brightning beams should fail
night comes, dark and'eerie,
cot-light cheers the dale.

There, though walth and waste ne'er tiot,
Humbler joys their comforts shed,
Labour—health—content and quiet-—
Mourner ! there ye'se get a, bed.
Wife 'tis true, wi' bairnies smiling,
There, alas ! ye need nae seek~ T
.
Yet their Bairns* ilk care beguiling', ml" &gt;
Paint wi' smiles a mither's cheek.
A' her earthly pride and plga^ure
Left to cheer her widow'd lot, .
A ' her warldly walth and treasure
To adorn her lanely cot {.
Cheer, then, Soldier, midst affliction
Brightning joys will aften shine ;
Vttttae aye claims Heaven's protection
Trust to providence divine I
r y:

:

�22
Sweet as RosebarikVwoods and rivet
Cool, wheii simmerV sunbeams dart,
Cam ilk word, and cooled the fever
That lang'burned at Willies heart.
Silent stept he on, poor fallow,
Listening to his guide before,
Owre green know and gowany hallow,
Till they reached the cot-houge door.
Laigh it was; yet sweet, though fumble;
Decked wi' hinnysuckle rdund;
Clear below Esk's waters ru mble,
v
Deep glens murmuring back tlie sound.
MelvilTs towers, &lt;&amp;e" white and stately,
Dim by gldaming glint to view;
Thro' Lasstoade's dark woods keek sweetly,
Skies
fei y tiri$ : BR %ae 1&gt;lu6f
Entering now in trarispoft mingle,
Mither fMd } and
\^eanl .
XFJ
C • I. round aTLIJ ' mgle. I
• &gt;I capty
omiling
Blessing on a cleah heartli stane.'
Soldier, welc&amp;ne !-Tcome, be cheery-?—i
Here yese rest, and take your bed-, ,
Faint, \vae£ fne! ye seem, and weary,
Pale's your cnt&amp;k, sae lately red.
Changed l a m , sighed Willie till her;
Changed, nae doubt, as changed can.be5
Yet, alas! does Jeanie Miller
Nought of Willie Gairiace see ?

JO 1

�23
Hae ye marked th#. dews of morning 7/
" Kjrlitleripg. in the sunny Say4
, ,I( &gt;
Quickly fa, , vrhan, without warning.
Rough blastsJcam and shook the spray,
,Hae ye seep the. hi j$$fast. fleeing • • &gt; v tl I *
.
Drap when pierced by Death mair fleet ?
Then see Jean, wi1 colour deeing, ;it
Senseless drap at Willie's feet* 1- i'ivl
V~
After t^uffja lang y^s'japUetfen
i i
( A ' tjieif ways now hushed t o u :
Jeari ance
fond aiF0§jtipn
C l a s p s , W i l l i e to, her breast.

»

TellsjJjim a1 ^er/fa^^i^jiifferifegpoq sdgid
Mow she wandered, starving pooi-V '
1 ;
Gleaming Pity's scanty, offerings ;
"A
1
Wi tol •- * bairns,- frae * "• to door]
three *' J ••
door
.ill
*
'
*
How sh$? s^ved^-and; jftoiled^-artd ievered/
Lost her health andqsyne her bread ;
How that grief, when scarce recovered* t&gt;ibl
Took her brain and turned her head/
How she wandered round the country
Mony a live-lang night her lane;
?
Till at last an angel'§ bounty
Brought her senses back again,
&gt; i3
•
Gae her meat—and claise—and siller;
Gae her bairnie?s wark and lear 5
Lastly, gae this cot-house till her,
W i ' four sterling pounds a year.

�24
Willi e9 heark'ning, wiped his e'en aye 5—
'Oh I what sins hae I to rue !
6
But say, wha's this angel, Jeanie !
/ W h a , quo Jeanie, 4 hut Buccleugh !
4

Here, supported—cheered—-and cherished
Nine blessed months I've lived and mair;
Seen these infants clad and nourished,
Dried my tears and tint despair/

Sometimes serving, sometimes spinning.,
Light the lanesome hours gae round;
Lightly, too, ilk quarter rinning.
Brings yon angels helping pound !
Eight pounds mair, cried Willie, fondly,
Eight pounds mair, will do nae harm,
And, O Jean, gin friends war kindly,
Eight pounds soon might stoclt a farm.
There ance mair to thrive by ploughing,
Freed frae a' that peace destroys,
Idle waste and drueken ruin,
W a r , and a its murdering joys !
T
Thrice he kissed his lang lbs£ treasure;
Thrice ilka bairn—but could nae speak;
Tears of love, and hope* and pleasure,
Streamed in silence down his cheek.

�</text>
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                <text>The History of Will and Jean: or, The sad effects of Drunkenness.</text>
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                <text>[1850?] per University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks</text>
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                <text>&lt;a title="University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks" href="http://special.lib.gla.ac.uk/chapbooks/search/"&gt;University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks&amp;nbsp;&lt;/a&gt;</text>
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                    <text>FOUR

Excellent Songs
JACK

ROBINSON.

T H E G I R L I L E F T B E H I N D ME.
LORD LOVEL.
T H E H A U G H S OF C R O M D A L K

GLASGOW:
PRINTED FOR TIIE

32.

BOOKSELLERS.

�BO R &amp; S.
JACK

ROBINSON.

THE perils and dangers of the voyage past,
And the ship to Porti^outh aiYivfed at? last,
The sails all furl'd and* the anchor cast;
The happiest of the crew was Jack Robinson:
For his Poll he had trinkets and gold* g&amp;lofe;
Besides prize-money quite a store,
And along with the crew he went ashore,
As cockswain to the boat, Jack Robinson.
Tol de rol, &amp;c.
He met with a man, and said, I say,
Mayhap you know one Polly Gray,
She lives somewhere hereabout—the man said, nay,
I do not, indeed, to Jack Robinson.
Says Jack to him, I've left my ship,
And all my messmates gave the slip,
Mayhap you'll partake of a* good can of flip,
For you're a civil fellow, says* Jack Robinson.
In a public-house, tlien^ they both sat down,
And talkVI of Admirals of high renown,
And drank as much grog as came to half-a-crown,
This here strange man and Jack Robinson.
Then Jack call'd out the reck'ning to pay,
The landlady came in, in line array,
My eyes and limbs! why here's Polly Gray,
Who'd thought of meetinghere, says Jack Robinson,

�3
The landlady stagger'd against ithe wall,
And said at first she didn't know him at all,
Shiver me,,.«ays Jack, why here's a pretty squall,
D—n me, don't you know me?—'I'm Jack Robinson
Don't you know this handkerchief you gave to me,
Twas three years ago, before I *werat *to sea,
Every day I look'dat, and then I thought of thee,
Upon my soul I have, says .Jack iRctbinson.
Says the lady, says she, I've chang'd,my state,
Why, you don't mean, says Jack, ..that you've got a mate
You know you promis'd—-says she, 1 could not .wait,
For 110 tidings could I gain of you, Jack Robinson ;
And somebody, one day, came to me and said,
That^omebody else had somewhere read,
In some newspaper, as how you were dead—
I've not been dead at all, says Jack Robinson.
Then he turned his quid, and finish'd his glass,
Hitch'd up his trowsers, alas! alas!
That ever I should live to be made such an ass,
To be biik'd by a woman, says Jack Robinson.
But to fret and stew about it much is all in vain,
I'll get a ship and go to Holland, France, and Spain.
No matter where, to Portsmouth I'll never&lt;come again,
And he was olf before they could say Jack (Robinson.

T H E G I R L I L E F T BE FUND ME.
I'M lonesome since I cross'd the hills,
And over the moors that Aire me,
With heavy thoughts my heart doth fill.
Since I parted from my Betty,

�In search of some one fine and gay,
But none could ever bind me,
And I think of the hours I pass'd away
With the girl I left behind me.
The hours I do remember well,
When recollections move me ;
A pain within my breast I feel,
Since first she own'd to love m e :
But now I'm going to Brighton camp,
I pray kind heav'n now guide me,
And send me safely back again
To the girl 1 left behind me.
But when I'm standing on parade,
Either asleep or waking,
I long to see my love again,
For her my heart is breaking ;
When I think of the vows of love,
The tears do fall and blind me,
When I think upon the form and grace
Of the girl I left behind me.
The falling waters I do see,
The dove become a ranger—
Such heavy thoughts run in my mind,
The hour 1 mesnt to change her;
Ye powers above, protect I pray,
The cautious fair that binds me,
And send me safely home again
To the girl 1 left behind me.

�*

T H E H A U G H S OF C R O M D A L E .

As I came in by Auchindoun,
A little wee bit frae the town,
When to the Highlands I was boun\
To view the haughs of Cromdale.
I met a man in tartan trews,
I speir'd at him what was the news ;
Quo' he, 44 The Highland army rues,
That e'er we came to Cromdale,
We were in bed, sir, every man,
When the English host upon us came;
A bloody battle then began,
Upon the haughs of Cromdale.
The English horse they were so rude,
They bathed their hoofs in Highland blood,
But, our brave clans, they boldly stood
Upon the haughs of Cromdale.

44

But, alas! we could no longer stay,
For o'er the hills we came away,
And sore we do lament the day
That e'er we came to Cromdale."
44

Thus the great Montrose did say,
44 Can you direct the nearest way,
For I will o'er the hills this day,
And view the haughs of Cromdale. *
Alas, my lord, you're not so strong,
You scarcely have two thousand men,
There's twenty thousand on the plain,
Stand rank and file on Cromdale.

44

�G
Thus Jhe ..great Moutvose did .say,
" I say, direct the nearest way,
For I will o'er the hills -ebis day,
And see the haughs of Oromdale."
They were at dinner, every »mm,
When great Montrose upon them c a m ;
A second battle then began,
Upon the haughs of Gromdale.
The Grant, Mackenzie, and M'Kay,
Soon as Montrose they did espy,
0 then, they fought most valiantly!
Upon the haughs of Gromdale.
The M'Donalds they returri'd again,
The Camerons did their standard join,
Mcintosh play'd a bloody game
Upon the haughs of Gromdale.
The M'Gregors fought like lions bold,
M'Phersons, none could them controul,
M'Lauchlans fought like loyal souls,
Upon the haughs of Cromdale.
M'Leans, M'Dougals, and M'Neils,
So boldly as they took the field,
And made their enemies to yield,
Upon the haughs of Cromdale.
The Gordons boldly did advance
The Frasers fought with sword and lance,
The Grahams'they made the heads to danoe,
Upon the ha i hs of'Cromdak.

�The loyal Stewarts, with Montrose,
So boldly set upon their foes,
And brought them down with Highland1 blows,
Upon the haughs of Cromdale,
Of twenty thousand, Cromwell's men,
Five hundred fled to Aberdeen,
The rest of them lie 011 the plaiii,
Upon the haughs of Cromdale.

LORD L O V E L .
stands at his stable door,
Mounted upon a grey steed ;
And bye came Ladie Nanciebel,
And wish'd Lord Lovel much speed.
LORD LOVF.L

" 0 wh'ar are you going, Lord LoVel,
9
My dearest tell to me V
&lt;{ O I am going a far journey,
Some far countrie to see ;
But I'll return in seven long years,
Lady Nanciebel to see."
" 0 ! seven, seven, seven long years,
They are much too long for me,"

44

He has gane a year away,
A year but barely ane,
When a strange fancy came into his head,
That fair Nanciebel was gane.

�8
It's then he rade, and better rade,
Until he cam to the toun,
And there he heard a dismal noise,
For the church bells a* did soun'
He asked what the bells rang for,
T h e j said, " Its for Nanciebel:
She died for a discourteous squire,
And his name is Lord LoveL"
The lid o' the coffin he opened up,
The linens he faulded doun ;
And aye he kiss'd her pale, pale lips,
And the tears cam trickling doun.
" Weel may I kiss those pale pale lips,
For they will never kiss me ;—
I'll mak a vow, and keep it true,
That they'll ne'er kiss ane but thee."
Lady Nancie died on Tuesday nicht,
Lord Lovel upon the neist day ;
Lady Nancie died for pure pure love,
Lord Lovel, for deep sorray.

�</text>
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                <text>&lt;a title="University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks" href="http://special.lib.gla.ac.uk/chapbooks/search/"&gt;University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks&amp;nbsp;&lt;/a&gt;</text>
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                    <text>STORY OF&#13;
&#13;
THE&#13;
&#13;
BITTER WEDDING.&#13;
&#13;
GLASGOW:&#13;
PRINTED FOR THE BOOKSELLERS.&#13;
&#13;
��THE&#13;
&#13;
BITTER WEDDING.&#13;
O ne fine summer morning—it was many&#13;
hundred years ago—young Berthold set out&#13;
with a very heavy heart from his Alpine hut,&#13;
with a view of reaching in the evening the&#13;
beautiful valley o f Siebenthal, where stood&#13;
his native village, and where he designed to&#13;
be an unknown and silent guest at the dancig&#13;
n&#13;
and festivity o f certain merry maker’s.&#13;
' Ah, heavens,’ sighed he, ' it will be a&#13;
bitter wedding! Had I died last spring it&#13;
had been better with me now.’&#13;
' Fiddle faddle!’ exclaimed a snarling&#13;
voice from the road side. ' Fiddle faddle !&#13;
Where master Almerich touches his strings,&#13;
there goes it merrily— there is the hurly&#13;
burly, dirling the bottoms out of the tubs and&#13;
pitchers ! Good morning, my child ! Come,&#13;
cheer up my hearty, and let us trudge on&#13;
together in good neighbourship.’&#13;
The young herdsman had stopped when&#13;
he heard such a frog-croak of a voice, and&#13;
now he could not speak for laughing. A n&#13;
odd-looking dwarfish figure mounted upon&#13;
&#13;
�4&#13;
&#13;
one leg and a half, and propped upon a&#13;
crutch, with a nose as long as one’s thumb,&#13;
came hobbling up quite out of breath, and&#13;
making half-a-dozen wry faces, from a foot&#13;
path on the left side of the road. Behind&#13;
him he trailed an enormous fiddle, on which&#13;
lay a large wallet— appurtenances which&#13;
s eemed to be attached - to such a little odd&#13;
figure by way of ballast, lest the rush of the&#13;
wind down the valley should sweep it away.&#13;
‘ Good, morning !’&#13;
Berthold at last&#13;
roared out,&#13;
you are a merry fellow, Maste&#13;
'&#13;
fiddler, and will prove heart’s ease to me&#13;
d&#13;
o&#13;
t ay. In spite o f my misfortunes I could not&#13;
help laughing a t the sight of you and your&#13;
hugeous fiddle. Pray take it not am iss; a&#13;
laugh has been a rare thing with me for&#13;
many a day.’&#13;
' H as it indeed,’ rejoined the dwarf ; ' and&#13;
yet so y ou n g! Perhaps you are heart-sick,&#13;
my son ?’&#13;
' Y es, i f you choose to call it so,’ replied&#13;
the herdsman, ‘ H ere in our mountains and&#13;
valleys, you will find a great many clouts of&#13;
fellows, who will be fanc ying themselves in&#13;
love, while they are all the time eating,&#13;
drinking, and sleeping, as sound as any&#13;
marmot, and in one year s time can as easily&#13;
pass from M argaret to Rosomund, as I from&#13;
this town to the other. That is all a mocke;&#13;
r&#13;
y&#13;
I would much rather die than forget&#13;
&#13;
�5&#13;
Siegeland,—though for me all rest and joy&#13;
are for ever vanished.’&#13;
‘ Aye, aye,’ replied Master Almerich, ‘ I&#13;
thought you were going to the dance, my&#13;
hearty,— I heard you crying out a bitter&#13;
wedding, and I thought to myself, ‘ Aha,&#13;
he does not get the right one,’&#13;
‘ And that’s true enough,’ replied&#13;
t&#13;
r&#13;
ehold; ‘ he does not get the right one,— that&#13;
B&#13;
Hildebrand! I will tell you the whole matter,&#13;
Master Almerich, as you seem to be going&#13;
the same way, if I guess right,’&#13;
‘ Ah, yes, good heavens!’ sighed the&#13;
dwarf: ‘ surely, surely, I would be going to&#13;
the wedding, if I had only got a pair of stout&#13;
legs, but look you here, my dear child, what&#13;
a miserable stump is this for crawling down&#13;
the mountain !— I am asthmatic too, and my&#13;
goitre has been enlarging these last fifty&#13;
years,—and that wallet has galled my back&#13;
sore all yesterday in climbing over the rough&#13;
hills— Heaven knows when I shall get to&#13;
.&#13;
the wedding! There was such a talking&#13;
about it on the other side of the mountain,&#13;
that, thought I to myself, I will away to&#13;
the wedding also and make some money ;&#13;
so I took my fiddle and began to crawl up&#13;
the ascent,:—yesterday I became quite&#13;
h&#13;
x&#13;
e austed—and now I must lay me down here&#13;
by the side of the road and submit to fate.&#13;
Tell me all about the wedding when you&#13;
&#13;
�6&#13;
&#13;
eurn, child—if the wolves have not swallowed&#13;
t&#13;
r&#13;
or hunger killed me before that time.’&#13;
With these words the dwarf, apparently&#13;
exhausted, sunk down with a deep and&#13;
a&#13;
l&#13;
encholy sigh on the nearest stone, threw his&#13;
m&#13;
bundle on the grass, and stretched out his&#13;
bony hand as if to take a last farewell o f&#13;
young Berthold, who stood leaning upon his&#13;
staff, and gazin g upon the fiddler, quite&#13;
nble to comprehend what ailed him.&#13;
a&#13;
u&#13;
' M aster,’ began the herdsman, ' how&#13;
drooping! You have left all your g ay&#13;
spirits at home! Although it is a weary&#13;
journey for me as well as you, I will yet&#13;
endeavour to carry your wallet and fiddle,&#13;
so I may enjoy your company on the road.&#13;
You must really hear what presses upon my&#13;
soul,—perhaps I may obtain some relief in&#13;
speaking it out, and you will have some pithy&#13;
word of comfort for me.&#13;
The dwarf accepted the kind offer and&#13;
quickly transferred his wallet and fiddle to&#13;
the stout shoulders of the herdsman; then&#13;
taking his crutch, he whistled a merry tune,&#13;
and trudged gaily on by the side of Berthold.&#13;
I&#13;
‘ t is a long story, this wedding,’ begun&#13;
the herdsman;&#13;
b&#13;
‘ ut I will be as b&#13;
possible, for it still grieves me to the heart&#13;
when I think about it, and whoever can&#13;
understand it at all, understands it soon; as&#13;
for me my sufferings will never be at an&#13;
&#13;
�7&#13;
end, though I should talk the whole day&#13;
about it.&#13;
' In the village there, below us, old&#13;
Bernhard has a pretty sweet girl of a&#13;
daughter, Siegelind ; he has lived for many&#13;
years, and his wife Gertrude with him, in a&#13;
nice little Cottage by the stream, where the&#13;
road strikes off into the wood. Their trade&#13;
is to make wooden spoons for the herdsmen,&#13;
by which, and the help of a goat and a couple&#13;
of sheep, they gain their livelihood.’&#13;
' L ast winter, having got some ashen&#13;
spoons and cups nicely cut, I thought with&#13;
myself, now, as my father is getting old,&#13;
and sends me with the cattle to the mountains&#13;
in spring, if I only behave there as becomes&#13;
a herdsman, what is there to prevent me&#13;
coming down in autumn and marrying&#13;
Siegelind ?&#13;
' Ah, Master Almerich, my words do poor&#13;
justice to my heart; my feelings always get&#13;
the start of them , and reason comes limping&#13;
after!&#13;
' I beheld Siegelind, you see, moving&#13;
actively about,— wearing a merry face late&#13;
and early,—&#13;
-all goodness and discretion froth&#13;
top to toe, and pretty too,—&#13;
overflowing with&#13;
g a y spirits and merry songs without number:&#13;
all this my eye, my ear, and my heart drun&#13;
in smoothly,—&#13;
-she was satisfied, and the&#13;
people too,— in summer I was to g o to&#13;
so&#13;
&#13;
�8&#13;
mountains, and at harvest-home to the&#13;
d&#13;
e&#13;
wing, and in the meantime she gave me&#13;
this waistcoat to wear on the hills in&#13;
b&#13;
m&#13;
e&#13;
r rance of her. ,&#13;
‘ Old Bernhard went to the forest in spring&#13;
to choose the finest stems, and to provide us&#13;
with nice furniture against the wedding.&#13;
' So one morning as he was ascending the&#13;
mountains through those ravines where there&#13;
are some marvellously fine trees, a little man,&#13;
in an odd sort of dress, hastened to meet him,&#13;
screaming violently and beckoning and callig&#13;
n&#13;
him so earnestly that he could not but&#13;
go with him. They soon reached a barn,&#13;
where he found the stranger’s wife lying sick&#13;
and in extremity. Her he relieved and&#13;
cured; but for me—bride, peace, and happin&#13;
e&#13;
s&#13;
,&#13;
were lost from that hour.’&#13;
A&#13;
' h, good heavens!’ exclaimed Almerich;&#13;
' you are talking bravely, whilst I am&#13;
almost starving—hop, hop, hop— we are&#13;
trudging on, and my stomach is as empty&#13;
as a bag-pipe ! Yesterday evening—&#13;
t&#13;
ohing ; this morning-—&#13;
n&#13;
nothing ! Oh that&#13;
brave wedding-dance; the fiddle runs off,&#13;
and Master Almerich is starving here!’&#13;
' Now, now, the deuce, then,’ bawled the&#13;
herdsman, ' what have you got in this cursed&#13;
wallet ? Here am I toiling on with this&#13;
plagued bag , rubbing the very skin off my&#13;
shoulders, —if there is not at least a little ham&#13;
&#13;
�9&#13;
and cheese and fresh bread in it,w h y should&#13;
I be smothered under such a bundle of rags.'&#13;
' Softly, softly, my son, ’ replied t h e&#13;
fiddler, ' there are treasures in that wallet,&#13;
an old barret cap of Siegefried, and an old&#13;
sword belt of Dieterich, and a couple of old&#13;
leathern soles o f Ylsan, child!— These are&#13;
no every-day concerns, my hearty ! They&#13;
are all estimable jewels to him who&#13;
s&#13;
r&#13;
e&#13;
d&#13;
n&#13;
utands the thing ; they are worth a whole&#13;
mountain of sweet wine; and seven acres of&#13;
thick golden wheat, to him who knows their&#13;
value.’&#13;
' It may he so,’ said the herdsman, ' I only&#13;
wish we had a few cups of milk in the place&#13;
of your treasures; but if it is so with your&#13;
stomach, my good master, look you, here is&#13;
a mouthful of g oatmilk cheese, I meant to&#13;
serve me for the night, but never mind, I am&#13;
little disposed to eat.’&#13;
Berthold now produced his provisions, and&#13;
Almerich devoured them as greedily as if he&#13;
meant to swallow the herdsman after them&#13;
by way of dessert. He then wiped his mouth,&#13;
leaped briskly up, was again in good spirits,&#13;
and stamped away before th e herdsman as&#13;
freshly as if nothing had ailed him. All&#13;
this, however, seemed very odd to Berthold,&#13;
and when he again felt the annoyance of the&#13;
wallet, he drew a sigh so deep that it echoed&#13;
back from the neighbouring rocks.&#13;
&#13;
�10&#13;
‘ L ack a d a y !’ cried Almerich again,&#13;
' the poor lad has lost his bride and his peace&#13;
o f heart; I have been so concerned about&#13;
him that I could not eat a bit ?'&#13;
' T hat fellow could devour the Stackhorn !&#13;
thought Berthold with some indignation.&#13;
' The club foot is not in his right senses, I&#13;
believe!’&#13;
' It was really to bad,’ began he, resumig&#13;
n&#13;
his story. ' The dwarf in the barn&#13;
returned a profusion of thanks to old&#13;
h&#13;
n ard, and said, ' I am a foreign miner,&#13;
r&#13;
e&#13;
B&#13;
and have lost the road with my good wife ;&#13;
so I have nothing to reward you for your&#13;
kind services, save a little bit of cheese and a&#13;
few draughts of wine, take that, and&#13;
m&#13;
e ember the poor fellow who gave you what&#13;
r&#13;
he could, and will pray that Heaven may&#13;
reward you farther,’&#13;
' Old Bernhard accepted the little bottle&#13;
and a piece o f cheese only to get rid of the&#13;
importunity of the dwarf, who would take&#13;
no refusal.&#13;
Towards noon, he was proceeding to his&#13;
village; the road was long, and feeling&#13;
fatigued, he laydown in the shade o f a tree,&#13;
took out the gift of the dwarf, and began to&#13;
eat and drink. Meanwhile, who should my&#13;
evil stars bring in his way but young&#13;
Hildebrand, the most miserly fellow in the&#13;
v illage! ' God bless you, father Bernhard!’&#13;
&#13;
�11&#13;
— '&#13;
Thank you ray son.’ Thus the&#13;
v&#13;
n&#13;
o&#13;
c ersation proceeded, The niggard sees the&#13;
old man comfortably enjoying his repast;&#13;
so he sets himself down beside him and takes&#13;
a share. There they eat and eat for about&#13;
an hour,— but the wine never gets less, and&#13;
the cheese is never done, and both behold&#13;
the miracle till their hair stands on end.&#13;
‘ All was now over, Master fiddler, and&#13;
poor Berthold was undone!&#13;
H&#13;
' ildebrand chose words which went&#13;
down with Bernhard as smoothly as honey,&#13;
and the long and the short of the matter&#13;
was, my dear sweet Siegelind was promised&#13;
to the rich miser, with the marvellous cheese&#13;
for her dowry. The old man was now quite&#13;
beside himself,—the young man talked finely&#13;
--they were to outdo the whole village, and&#13;
keep their secret to themselves; I was called&#13;
a miserable wretch, and the spirit of mischief&#13;
just brought me into their way in time to&#13;
hear the whole sad story.’&#13;
‘ Ah, good heavens,’ exclaimed Almerich&#13;
again, ' I am undone with cold; it is turnig&#13;
n&#13;
a chill rainy day, and my bones are so&#13;
naked!— Hew, hew, how the storm blows&#13;
into my very soul! This day will be the&#13;
death of me.— I thought so before. Take&#13;
your way, my son, I give you my fiddle in&#13;
a present,—leave me the wallet here, I will&#13;
stretch myself out to die upon it.’&#13;
&#13;
�12&#13;
' The mischief is in i t !’ grumbled B erthold.&#13;
' I f matters are to go on in this way, we shall&#13;
be a year and a day hence still travelling&#13;
this cursed road? H ark ye, old boy, you&#13;
are an odd fellow! what tempted you to think&#13;
of wandering through our rough country,&#13;
without meat or drink or even a coat, but&#13;
with a fiddle as large as a ton, and an empty&#13;
wallet as heavy as seven three stone cheeses !&#13;
’Tis a perfect tempting of Providence!&#13;
W hy the deuce do you drag after you that&#13;
ass’s burden of old rubbish, without so much&#13;
as the convenience of a cloak in your bundle!’&#13;
' It is all very true,’ sighed Almerich.&#13;
' I am not yet accustomed to be the lame,&#13;
feeble man you now see me. Thirty years&#13;
ago I could skip like a leveret over hills and&#13;
dales; but now, farewell to friend Almerich,&#13;
I shall never leave this place! However it&#13;
is all one,—perish here, or die there, a dying&#13;
bed is ever a hard one, even though it should&#13;
be o f down and silk ?’&#13;
' Now really,’ replied Berthold, ' you are&#13;
too whimsical, fiddler ! The cold blast never&#13;
hurts a tough fellow who is accustomed to&#13;
run about the mountains,— there, slip into&#13;
my coat, and walk smartly on, for a shower&#13;
is approaching, and that rascally wallet is&#13;
weighing me down to the ground.’&#13;
‘ Patience, child, patience!’ said Almerich&#13;
--- ' This coat is quite warm from your&#13;
&#13;
�13&#13;
shoulders,— I feel very comfortable in it,—&#13;
slowly, gently, your story of the marvellous&#13;
cheese and wine has restored me to warmth&#13;
—how did the matter go on ?’&#13;
‘ You rogue and rascal! ’ thought Berthold&#13;
to himself, and thus continued his lamentable&#13;
tale.&#13;
' How did it go on !— Gertrude sang to the&#13;
same tune as her husband; Siegelind grew&#13;
sad, and lost her bloom and strength; the&#13;
old boy urged the matter, and Hildebrand&#13;
too,— Bernhard was anxious to get the rich&#13;
and proud son-in-law, and was in great fear&#13;
lest the enchanted wine should soon dry up,&#13;
—the young fellow had money in his eye,&#13;
and wished to turn the bewitched cheese to&#13;
usury,— thus the wedding was determined&#13;
on, and I was left in sadness upon my mountn&#13;
a&#13;
i.&#13;
I tried to forget it; I thought&#13;
Siegelind could not have borne me in her&#13;
heart, otherwise she would not, even to escape&#13;
death and martyrdom, have married the red&#13;
haired Hildebrand. L ast night, however,&#13;
I could find neither rest nor sleep upon my&#13;
straw, I must go and see her with my own&#13;
eyes take that miser for her husband. Near&#13;
the village I will wrap up my head and dye&#13;
my hands and cheeks with berries, so that&#13;
nobody will know me,—nor in the bustle of&#13;
the wedding, when every thing is turning&#13;
topsy turvy, will a living soul ,care for poor&#13;
&#13;
�14&#13;
Berthold. When all is over, I shall, so it&#13;
please Heaven, become wise a g a in ; or if&#13;
not, my poor brain will be turned altogether,&#13;
and that will be a blessing too.’&#13;
‘ M y good child,’ said the dwarf, ‘ you will&#13;
get over all this. I perceive very well that&#13;
it is a hard journey, and a bitter wedding&#13;
too for y ou : but it is your good luck, my&#13;
child, that you have me for a companion—&#13;
I will fiddle till your heart leaps again ,—&#13;
your sorrow grieves me as much as if it were&#13;
my own.’&#13;
Whilst talking thus, a few drops of rain&#13;
fell, which proved the prelude to a heavy&#13;
shower; and although the travellers had&#13;
r&#13;
l&#13;
aeady gone a considerable way, they were&#13;
still far from the end of their journey, and&#13;
gush after gush, the rain poured upon their&#13;
heads till the water run down from their hats&#13;
as from a spout.&#13;
Berthold trudged silently on, sighing&#13;
frequently and heavily under his burden,—he&#13;
could have sworn that it increased a pound’s&#13;
weight every step, nevertheless it was&#13;
m&#13;
i ossible for his good nature to think o f&#13;
p&#13;
i&#13;
gng it back to the poor cripple in such a&#13;
v&#13;
pest. The rain soon began to trickle through&#13;
m&#13;
e&#13;
t&#13;
his waistcoat, and run in a cold stream down&#13;
his back, he wished himself, the dwarf, and&#13;
the wedding all far enough, but stalked&#13;
sullenly on through the mud as if he had&#13;
&#13;
�15&#13;
been wading through the highest Alpine&#13;
grass.&#13;
The fiddler limped close behind him,&#13;
croaking occasionally through his raven&#13;
throat, an old spring song, which told of&#13;
sunshine, and singing birds, and pleasure,&#13;
and love. A t times he drew himself snugly&#13;
together, and expatiated on the excellencies&#13;
of the herdsman’s coat, which he declared&#13;
was quite waterproof,— and then he would&#13;
exhort Berthold to step leisurely, to pay&#13;
particular attention to the wallet and fiddle,&#13;
and above all not to overheat himself.&#13;
The herdsman would have lost all patience&#13;
and courage a thousand times over in&#13;
draggin g his hundred weight of a load and&#13;
playing the fool to the crazy fiddler, if he&#13;
had not been ashamed to throw away the&#13;
burden which he had volunteered to carry,&#13;
and forsake the person whose company he&#13;
had himself invited. But in his heart he&#13;
vowed deeply and solemnly never again to&#13;
lend his coat to a fiddler, nor give away his&#13;
cheese, nor to carry a fiddle and wallet, and&#13;
after all be mocked and laughed at by such&#13;
an odd quiz of a fellow. ‘ I f ,’ thought he&#13;
at last, ‘ the upshot of all this is a fever in&#13;
the evening which carries me quickly off-—&#13;
be it so,-— remains a bitter wedding!’&#13;
it&#13;
After a few hours rain, the two pedestrians&#13;
reached the valley, where a swollen and&#13;
&#13;
�16&#13;
rapid torrent, which had swept away every&#13;
vestige of the little bridge that led to the&#13;
village, with the exception of a single small&#13;
plank, rushed across the path; the herdsm&#13;
a&#13;
n&#13;
heeded not the narro footing, and was&#13;
w&#13;
stepping boldly across, when his companion&#13;
began to roar out lustily about the dangers&#13;
of the path : ' Fo r my life and soul I will&#13;
not move from the spot! N either cat nor&#13;
rah could pass over there,— I would be a dead&#13;
man if I ventured on that cursed plank !&#13;
Let them fiddle yonder who can swim,— I&#13;
wish I was in a feather bed with my fiddle&#13;
for a pillow!’&#13;
' Don’t make such a noise about i t !’ cried&#13;
Berthold. ' I f we have got thus far, we will&#13;
surely go on a little, farther,-— I have&#13;
if&#13;
brought the fiddler this length to the bitter&#13;
dance, I will also bring him to the wedding&#13;
house,—though I am a fool, I am neverthels&#13;
e&#13;
a good-natured one.’&#13;
With these words the herdsman took off&#13;
the fiddle and wallet from his back , and&#13;
supplied the place with the dwarf, whom he&#13;
carried over as easily as a bundle of straw.&#13;
He then returned for the fiddle, wallet, and&#13;
crutch, which lay as heavy as so many stones&#13;
upon his shoulders.&#13;
' Well, the best of it now is,’ said he, that&#13;
we shall soon reach the village,— but either&#13;
my head is turned, or that wallet is filled&#13;
&#13;
�17&#13;
with f esh and blood, ,and master Almerich’s&#13;
l&#13;
body is stuffed with chaff! ’&#13;
' Nonsense!&#13;
'&#13;
replied the fiddler with a&#13;
broad grin, ' You have behaved well, child;&#13;
it would be a great pity i f :the bride yonder&#13;
would not g e t you ; you have the genuine&#13;
patience of the lamb in you, yet I perceive&#13;
you have also strength enough, with your&#13;
heart in the right place, and as much wisdom&#13;
as there is any need of in the country. Come,&#13;
let us paint your cheeks, and put on the old&#13;
cap you will find in my wallet, and the green&#13;
waistcoat and get that belt about you;&#13;
d&#13;
o&#13;
t ay you will be the fiddler’s boy, and not a&#13;
liv in g creature know you.’&#13;
The fiddler opened his wallet and threw&#13;
out its contents to Berthold, whose face he&#13;
painted with cranberries, and beard and&#13;
b&#13;
y&#13;
e rows with a bit of coal, and then they&#13;
walked gaily on towards the village.&#13;
Evening was just coming on, and the sun&#13;
broke out all at once from under the clouds,&#13;
— the birds -began to sing cheerfully,—the&#13;
flowers, opened their leaves as if to listen,&#13;
and Berthold felt his clothes sooner dried&#13;
than if he had been sitting close to a large&#13;
fire.&#13;
In a few minutes our wanderers mingled&#13;
with the merry wedding-guests; noises and&#13;
merriment were echoing all around, and no&#13;
one looked sad but Siegelind, who kept her&#13;
&#13;
�18&#13;
tearful eyes fixed upon the ground. The&#13;
old fiddler was welcomed with shouts of&#13;
applause ; for the rain had prevented the&#13;
arrival of the band o f fiddlers and pipers who&#13;
had been invited on the occasion, and every&#13;
body thought it a piece o f marvellous good&#13;
luck for the wedding that master Almerich&#13;
should have got through.&#13;
' Now, children,’ exclaimed the old boy,&#13;
‘ fetch us something to drink, and some&#13;
cheese and bread, and do not forget that&#13;
youth who has dragged myself as well as my&#13;
fiddle here to-day.’&#13;
The guests hastened to execute the old&#13;
fiddler’s commands, and even Gertrude and&#13;
Bernhard bustled about to serve him. Poor&#13;
Berthold’s heart was bleeding, but he kept&#13;
eating and drinking, that he might not be&#13;
obliged to speak. Mean while the old fiddler&#13;
put dry strings on his instrument, and began&#13;
to tune it so stoutly that it thrilled through&#13;
marrow and bone, and quickly drew the&#13;
attention of all upon the musician.’&#13;
‘ Bless me,’ whispered Bernhard to&#13;
t&#13;
r&#13;
erude,’ ‘ upon my faith it is the very dwarf&#13;
G&#13;
who g a ve me the bewitched wine and cheese!&#13;
Be gentle to him wife, and say not a single&#13;
word.’&#13;
A ll at once the fiddle struck up so briskly&#13;
that the very house shook with blow upon&#13;
blow,—he commenced such a furious strain&#13;
&#13;
�19&#13;
&#13;
that the whole company leaped up from their&#13;
benches and began dancing as if they were&#13;
mad. ‘ Heigh, heigh!’ shouted the people.&#13;
‘ There is a fiddle!’ and every one capered&#13;
and whirled through the wedding chamber&#13;
as if they danced for a wager. The young&#13;
people led out the dance, and the old ones&#13;
hobbled as fast after them as they could;&#13;
and nobody stood idle but Siegelind:—who&#13;
wished herself ten thousand miles away from&#13;
the merriment—and Berthold, who gazed&#13;
stedfastly and sorrowfully upon his beloved.&#13;
In the midst of his fiddling, Master&#13;
Almerich beckoned to the beautiful bride to&#13;
step near him ; ‘ There stands a little bottle&#13;
yonder where your bridegroom has been&#13;
seated, and some old cheese with it,— I dare&#13;
say it will not be the worst in the house,— I&#13;
would taste a little of it,—this playing&#13;
makes me a little nice in the palate.’&#13;
The good natured bride brought the bottle&#13;
and cheese, and placed them on a chair beside&#13;
him, knowing no reasonable objection to the&#13;
old man’s taking as much as he could eat.&#13;
The dwarf quickly laid his fiddle aside,&#13;
raised the bewitched bottle in his right hand,&#13;
and the cheese in his left, and exclaimed&#13;
with a loud voice,&#13;
W&#13;
' ell, my good peo&#13;
well, here’s the health of that beautiful bride&#13;
there and her sweetheart; may she live long&#13;
and joyfully!’&#13;
&#13;
�20&#13;
'&#13;
L o n g and joyfully!’ resounded through&#13;
the room, while fifty bonnets and hats were&#13;
tossed up into the air.&#13;
But horror struck and deadly pale did&#13;
Hildebrand and Bernhard a n d Gertrude&#13;
become when they saw the wondrous wine&#13;
and enchanted cheese in Almerich’s uplifted&#13;
fist. ' Dares he—can he—will h e !’ darted&#13;
through their hearts. But, woe and alas !&#13;
in one turn of his hand, the glutton with his&#13;
large ox-mouth, had swallowed the bewitche&#13;
d&#13;
draught and marvellous cheese without&#13;
leaving a morsel!&#13;
A roar of passion from the red haired&#13;
Hildebrand, and a gush of tears from&#13;
Gertrude, now terrified the people: while&#13;
old Bernhard stood like one petrified. But&#13;
a cheerful smile lightened upon the counte­&#13;
nance of Siegelind, and Berthold rose boldly&#13;
from his bench, and stood ready to use his&#13;
fists upon Hildebrand if he should dare to&#13;
touch the fiddler.&#13;
Y&#13;
‘ ou rogu e! you b e g g a r!’ at last&#13;
c&#13;
x&#13;
elaimed Hildebrand.&#13;
Who told you to&#13;
give that old fool of a fiddler that gift of&#13;
heaven ? You may now toss your house&#13;
and your bride too to the moon ; I no&#13;
longer care a straw for you or all that&#13;
l&#13;
eongs to you !’&#13;
b&#13;
With words o f venom and execration,&#13;
Hildebrand rushed out of the room, whilst&#13;
&#13;
�21&#13;
the enraged Bernhard and his crowd of&#13;
guests looked terrified after him. ' I am an&#13;
undone man ! at last exclaimed Bernhard.&#13;
‘ M y child and we are all ruined! The&#13;
wedding feast and the adornments are all&#13;
unpaid! Oh cursed, horrid miser ! bring&#13;
me a knife—a knife !’&#13;
A&#13;
' fig for a knife!’ exclaimed the fiddler.&#13;
S&#13;
‘ ee here is the bridegroom just come, who&#13;
has brought with him a whole wallet full of&#13;
gold,—and the bride loves him with all her&#13;
heart, and the guests are all together—and&#13;
my fiddle is in glorious tune!’&#13;
With these words Almerich crippled&#13;
w&#13;
r&#13;
o&#13;
f ard to the half bewildered and yet joyful&#13;
Berthold, and drew him into the circle: he&#13;
then wiped the paint off his face with the&#13;
skirts of his coat, and showed to the delighted&#13;
bride and the astonished guests their well&#13;
known neighbour, who was dear and&#13;
c&#13;
l&#13;
eome to all. He then ordered the wallet to&#13;
w&#13;
be dragged forward, and having opened the&#13;
lock, behold a prodigious quantity of pure&#13;
red gold tumbled out from it, dazzling the&#13;
eyes of all with its splendour! Old Bernhard&#13;
and Gertrude embraced Berthold with tears&#13;
of repentance, and Berthold by turns&#13;
b&#13;
m&#13;
e raced the lovely Siegelind and the ugly&#13;
dwarf. Almerich took his fiddle and struck&#13;
up a tune which bewitched them all, and they&#13;
danced till midnight in joy and glory. The&#13;
&#13;
�22&#13;
musician then escaped, and le ft a whole house&#13;
fu ll o f m erry-m akers around the two happy!&#13;
lovers, who, till their last d a y, a thousand&#13;
times blessed the bitter w edding in which&#13;
they had been so w onderfully united by the&#13;
benevolent lam e dwarf.&#13;
&#13;
�23&#13;
H IP P S L E Y ’ S D R U N K E N M A N .&#13;
&#13;
H ere Betty you jade ! bring me a pint of&#13;
half-and-half— sure you mix them— and&#13;
-be&#13;
put them in separate ju gs. B e tty ! hang&#13;
that girl—she goes up stairs twenty times&#13;
a-day, and never comes down again.&#13;
f&#13;
n&#13;
oound the back of this chair, it is always&#13;
C&#13;
behind. Well, I have given my wife the&#13;
slip at la s t : A h ! she is quite a domestic&#13;
christian— she knocks off the heels of her&#13;
shoes on a saturday-night to prevent her&#13;
i&#13;
o&#13;
gng to church on the Sunday.— She’s quite a&#13;
pious woman—&#13;
whenever I conceal my money,&#13;
I always put it in the bible, I am sure my&#13;
wife will never go there to look for it. I&#13;
have the finest set o f children a man would&#13;
wish to stick a knife into. There’s my son&#13;
Jam es—he will be a counsel or a bishop, I&#13;
am certain, he is so wise :— His mother sent&#13;
him on an errand; turning the corner of a&#13;
street, he met a lawyer full plump, which&#13;
knocked him down—the poor boy has never&#13;
spoke a word of truth ever since. There’s&#13;
my daughter P e g —she certainly will be a&#13;
queen one day or other-—she’s so cute:— The&#13;
other day her mother was ironing the clothes;&#13;
the iron was red hot; she, like a wise child&#13;
took hold of it to help her mother—and what&#13;
do you think ? she let it drop in a moment.&#13;
&#13;
�24&#13;
There’s my daughter Sukey, she beyo&#13;
doubt will be an empress some day I ’m sure,&#13;
she’s so wonderfully wise :— The Parson or&#13;
the parish sent a pair of black stocking's to&#13;
be darned; and to show the child’s wisdom&#13;
—she darned them with white worsted, and&#13;
sent the Parson hopping- to church like a&#13;
magpie. [Takes&#13;
upa&#13;
_— Constantinople— One thousand seven&#13;
hundred— and fast asleep. This evening&#13;
the Pope was brought to-bed of a pair of&#13;
twins: what was wonderful, they were booted&#13;
and spurred, with whips in their hands.&#13;
This evening, an empty chaise passed this&#13;
town with a lawyer fast asleep in it. Thursd&#13;
a&#13;
y&#13;
morning at three o’clock in the afternoon,&#13;
a fire broke out in an empty house and quite&#13;
consumed the furniture. A poor man fell&#13;
from a garret window into the street—&#13;
-very&#13;
fortunately he had a flannel nightcap on,&#13;
which saved his brains from being, knocked&#13;
out. Here B etty! tell my wife to go to a&#13;
joiner and purchase a wooden grate— I know&#13;
she is a sensible -woman and very careful—&#13;
for I think, when the fire is in it, it will be&#13;
all in a blaze. Here Betty, Betty !&#13;
&#13;
�</text>
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                    <text>NEW AND IMPROVED SERIES
No. 9.

A SELECTION OP

RECEIPTS,

ADVICES,

AND

DIRECTIONS,

RELATIVE TO

H O U S E K E E P I N G , C L E A N I N G , &amp;c,

FROM T H E MOST A P P R O V E D SOURCES.

GLASGOW:
P R I N T E D FOR THE
1850.

BOOKSELLERS

�C O NT E NTS.

rAGE,

T H E CHOICE OF A HOUSE,.... 3

Finishings,
,..
Tables,; Chairs, &amp;c.,
Earthenware and China,...
Plate^.;.:/......................
Grates,
Gilding,

3
4
4
4
5
5

HOUSEKEEPING &amp; CLEANING, 5

Servants,
6
Wooden Floors,
6
Carpets,
7
Oilcloths,
7
Marble Hearths and Chimney-pieces,
7
Walls of Houses,
. 7
Walls of Rooms,
8
Paper-hanging,
8
Picture-frames, ....*...
8
IvoVv, . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8
Brass Initi al Work,
8
Windows and LookingGlasses,.......... . . ........... 9
Brass and Copper,............ 9
Grates and Stoves,...,
9
Kitchen Vessels,
10
J Knives,
10
Lamp Glasses,
10
10
t Furniture,
Varnishing,
12
Bottles,
12
Plate,
12
Flannel or Woollen Articles, 13
Silks,
...
,.13
Bed Feathers,
13

Lace,
Scarlet Cloth,
Clear Starching,.. *..

13
13
14

Stains,

...........1.14

VERMIN,

20

Ink Marks or Iron Moulds, 14
Paint or Grease Spots,
14
To Extract Grease from
Silk,
14
To Remove a Tight Stopper, 15
Economical Fuel,
15
To Light a Fire,
....15
Smoky Chimneys,
16
To Purify Water,
19
To Filter Water,
191?

Rats and Mice,
20
Bugs,
20
Fleas,..:
...21
• Lice,.:..;.:..:::.;;..*;..:..:.....2i ;
Beetles, Cockroaches, &amp;c., 21
Flies,
21
Moths,
21
' Slugs, ..:...............
22,

DOMESTIC MANUFACTURES, ..22

Blacking for Shoes,
Blacking-Balls,
Blacking for Harness,
Cement,
Paste,
Waterproof Shoes,..
Ink,
Bottle Wax,
Potato Starch,.^,.
Potash.

22"
22:
22:
23'
23l|
23
24

24
24
24

�Tilh

XAMTLY

RECEIPT

BOOK.

T H E CHOICE OF A HOUSE.
Inhere are several important matters to be taken into con*
sideration in making choice of a liouse. In tlie first place,
take care that it is not damp. Dampness may arise from
-many, causes, but imperfect drainage, and close contact of tha
floors with the grqnpd, are the principal. When a house is damp
in any part, by all means avoid it, for it may produce the most
pernicious effects on the health of your family. Secondly,
see that the house has a free open exposure for fresh air, and,
if all other ^circumstances suit, prefer that which has an exposure to the south, for you will then have the beneficial
influence of the sun's rays. Thirdly, ascertain if there be a
plentiful supply of. good water in the premises, and if there
be proper means at hand for drying and bleaching clothes.
Fourthly, learn whether the vents go well, and do not smoke.
There are other inquiries you should also make, such as freedom from vermin, &amp;c., but these are left to your own judgment.
FURNISHINGS.

When about to furnish a house, "take care to set out on a
right principle in the selection of articles, Neatness, and a
pleasing effect to the eye, require that there should be a harmony of colours, and a similarity of style in the main articles
pf furniture. Therefore, you must exercise a little taste and
judgment in your first selections, if you wish to avoid committing a blunder which will cost you much subsequent
annoyance. For example, let the tints of the carpet, of the
paper or pamt of the walls, and of the window curtains, be
•all in harmony in each room—that is, either possess a general
resemblance of colour, or various colours in pleasing contrast
with each other., Carpets being the most expensive articles, it
is safest to buy them first,.and. then to let their colour lead the
tone and style of hearthrugs, curtains, paper-hangings, &amp;c. It is
also an economical plan to buy carpets of the same pattern

�4
for several rooms, because, in the CTf-nt 9 f
ai to a
house with different sized apartments, a piece of one carpet
may be taken to eke out another.
T A B L E S , C H A I R S , &amp;C.

When ordering tables, chair* V - " f wooden articles of
a fine quality, tike - - " / P e c t f r that they mnst he of a
110 v e n e e r e ^ «
solid fabric v eneermg is only tolerable
i n „ jk&gt;vv articles which are not to be subjected to much tear
and wear; nevertheless, a practice has begun of veneering
articles in daily use, such as chairs and tables, and consequently they are soon destroyed. Examine closely the back
and seat-frames of every mahogany chair, and reject it if it be
veneered. In ordering sofas, you should also take care to
bargain for genuine hair stuffing, for in many instances the
stuffing is composed of what is technically called pob, or a
composition of tow, wool, and other kinds of rubbish.
E A R T H E N W A R E AND C H I N A .

In purchasing your china and earthenware articles for the
table, take care to select sets which, in case of breakage, can
at all times and in all places be easily matched. If you buy
table ware of a peculiar or rare pattern, and afterwards break
several pieces, you may find it impossible to replace them.
Thus a particular set of earthenware or china, however beautiful and cheap, may ultimately prove a source of great
annoyance and no little expense.
PLATE.

Whatever silver articles you buy, let them be of a genuine
kind, or of sterling silver plate, which always keeps its value,
however old and worn it may become. Avoid all plated goods,
for the plating soon wears off, and then the article is valueless. If
you cannot afford to purchase sterling silver plate, your most
economical plan, consistent with elegance of appearance, will
be to get a few articles of German silver. This is properly
the metal called nickel, and closely resembles sterling silver
in texture and colour. In hardness and durability, it is
superior to sterling silver, and its price is only about a tenth
of what genuine plate would cost. German silver is now
manufactured to a large extent in England, and is made into
spoons, forks, ladles, tea-pots, salvers, dish-covers, and all
other articles for the table. The articles in Britannia metal,
such as tea-pots, coffee-pots, &amp;c. should be of a durable fabric,
and always kept well scoured.

�5
GRATES.

In choosing grates for your rooms, do not buy those which have
burnished steel fronts, as they require more care in cleaning,
and are liable to rust during summer when not in use. The
best and neatest, as well as the cheapest, grates, are those
which are made of cast iron, and of an ornamental pattern.
Let the grates which you select be small or of moderate size
in the fire-place. Wide, open grates, by admitting cold air
into the chimney, are exceedingly liable to smoke.
GILDING.

Order all the gilding of your picture frames and other
articles to be done in oil: it is infinitely more durable, and
will wash when soiled.
HOUSEKEEPING A N D CLEANING.
Every good housewife should keep a regular and continuous
account of her income and expenditure. This is a very essential part of domestic duty, and should not be neglected.
When properly set about, there is little or no trouble in keeping the household accounts; and for the guidance of young
housewives, with whom frugality should be an object, we beg
to suggest the following simple plan of keeping them:—Procure a small slate-book—that is, a little book composed of
three slates, bound in a plain cover. This, which you write
upon with a slate pencil, is your day-booh; it is always at
hand for you to scroll down any note of outlay, and will keep
several days' or a week's accounts at a time. A t any leisure
moment, you carry the entries of outlay from the slates to a
small ruled paper book, which is your ledger. One page of
this is devoted to money received, and the opposite page to
money paid out. By doing this regularly, and comparing
the entries of sums received with the entries of sums expended, so as to see that they square with each other, you
will find that you possess a complete record of family expenses, satisfactory alike to yourself and to your husband,
should he make any inquiry into the subject. The keeping
of an account of receipts and disbursements, in this or any
other convenient manner, is calculated to check the tendency
to over-expenditure, or living beyond the means. Guard
against the practice of buying on credit, and running up bills
with tradesmen. If you can at all avoid taking credit, do so;
for by paying for every article with ready money, you possess
two decided advantages—you get every thing cheaper as you
want it, and you can go anywhere to seek out the best markets.

�6
SERVANTS.

The practice of hiring domestic servants for six months
at once has partly given place to engagements of one month.
It is better that the term hired for at the first should be short,
and if both parties- are pleased, a re-engagement can easily be
made afterwards. In this manner there is no vexatious obligations to keep together, and a separation can always take
place amicably. Many servants remain years in a place,
though hired on the understanding that it is only from month
to month, or, what is the same thing, hirecl for no fixed
period, but just so long as both parties agree; and that, in
the event of any dissatisfaction, there shall be a week or a
month's warning given to leave.
A good mistress generally makes a good servant. She
endeavours to. seek out and attach a good servant to herself.
She effects this attachment and good-will by simply laying
before the servant her line of duties, or what is expected of
her, and then leaving her to execute these duties in a regular
methodic manner. No servant likes to be interfered with in
her work, or to be called away from one thing to do another;
nevertheless, some mistresses are not happy "unless they are
going in and out of the kitchen, or bustling up and down the
house, ordering and counter-ordering or in some other way
worrying the servant out of all patience. W e advise the
young housewife to prescribe to her servants, in plain terms,
the duties which she expects they will daily and regularly
execute ; and if the servants are unfit to perform them, it is
better for both that there should be a separation. Where
two or more servants are engaged, the precise duties of each
should be expressly defined, in order to prevent disputes between them, and that the work of the house may be duly and
properly performed. ;
W O O D E N FLOORS,

If kept in order by daily, sweeping and other small attentions,
may be effectually cleaned by washing them with warm water
and soap; but if spots of grease are to be removed, the spots
must be previously taken out by fuller's earth. Ink spots
may be discharged with spirits of salt. The floors of bedrooms should be washed as seldom as possible. It is most
dangerous to the health of the person who occupies the bedroom to wash or scour it, unless the weather be fine, to allow
the window to be opened for thoroughly drying the room
before night. A damp mop may, when necessary, be passed
lightly over the floor.

�7
CARPETS.

Ordinary Kidderminster carpets can only be cleaned by
shaking and beating; if cleaned by means of washing, they
become so soft as to be speedily dirtied again, and their appearance is spoiled. Brussels carpets may be cleaned as
follows:—Take them np and shake and beat them, so as to
render them perfectly free from dust. Have the floor thoroughly
scoured and tlry, and nail the carpet firmly down upon it.
Take a pailful of clean cold spring water, and put into it about
three gills of oxgall. Take another pair with clean cold
water only. Now, rub with a soft scrubbing brush some of the
Oxgall water on the carpet, which will raise a lather. "When
a convenient sized portion is done, wash the lather off with a
clean linen cloth dipped in the clean water. Let this water
be changed frequently. When all the lather has disappeared,
rub the part with a clean dry cloth. After all is done, open
the window to allow the carpet to dry. A carpet treated in
this manner will be greatly refreshed in colour, particularly
the greens. In laying carpets, cover the floor beneath them
with large sheets of paper, to prevent dust from rising between
the boards. A carpet lasts longer by adopting this precaution.
OIL-CLOTIIS.

Oil or painted cloths should be laid only on dry floors; if
the floor be damp, the cloth will soon mildew and rot. Such
cloths, laid even in the driest situation, should be wetted as little
as possible. When to be cleaned, they should be wiped with
a wet cloth, and rubbed gently till dry.
M A R B L E H E A R T H S AND C H I M N E Y P I E C E S

May be cleaned as f o l l o w s M i x a gill of soap lees,
half a gill of turpentine, and a bullock's gall, and make them
into a paste with pipe-clay, which lay upon the marble, and
let it remain a day or two, then rub it off, and the stains will
have disappeared, unless they are of long standing, when the
paste must be again applied. Polished marble requires careful treatment, as any acid will destroy the polish. In general,
warm water and soap will be found the safest thing for cleaning chimney pieces.
W A L L S OF H O U S E S .

The outer surfaces of walls, formed of brick or sandstone,
sometimes imbibe moisture from the atmosphere, and this
gives a dampness to the interior. If it be found unsuitable to
plaster and white-wash the outside, the damp may be greatly

�8
prevented by painting the walls with a single coat of oil-paini;,
which, by being light in colour, will give a neat and clean
effect.
W A L L S OF ROOMS.

When walls of rooms or staircases are to be painted in oil,
let the paint be of the best description. It is not unusual for
inferior tradesmen to use whiting, instead of white lead, as
a pigment; by this deception, the paint will afterwards
scarcely endure washing. Supposing, however, that the paint
has been of the best kind, considerable care will be required
in cleaning it. The safest and most simple plan is to take a
pail of hot water and put into it as much common yellow or
soft soap as will raise a lather or froth. Now wash the walls
well with a flannel cloth dipped in this water ; then wash this
soapy water off with clean flannel and clean warm water.
Dry with a clean linen cloth. Do all this equally, so as not
to leave smears or parts better washed or wiped than others.
P A P E R HANGING.

Paper hanging should be first dusted and then cleaned by
a stale loaf of bread, with the crumb surface cut smoothly,
and gently rubbed, the dirty face of the bread being cut away
from time to time. The imitative marble-paper, highly varnished, may be washed with cold water and soap. PAPIER
MACHE, now much used for mouldings and ornaments in
rooms, may be cleaned with soap and water.
PICTURE FRAMES.

Picture frames of varnished or French-polished wood may
be washed with soap and warm v/ater, and sponge or flannel.
Frames which are gilt in the ordinary manner, or " watergilt," cannot endure washing or rubbing; but if "oil-gilt,"
they may be washed with cold water and a soft brush.
IVORY.

Ivory may be restored to its original whiteness by cleaning
it with a paste of burnt pumice-stone and water, and then
placing it under glasses in the sun's rays.
B R A S S INITIAL W O R K .

This is best cleaned as follows :—Mix tripoli and linseed
Oil, and dip into it a rubber of hat, with which polish the
work. If the wood be ebony or rosewood, polish it with a
little finely-powdered elder-ashes; or make a paste of rottenStone, a little starch, sweet oil, and oxalic acid, mixed with

�9

%

water. The ornaments of a French clock are, however, best
cleaned with bread -crumb, carefully rubbed, so as not to spoil
the wood work. Ormolu candlesticks, lamps, and branches,
may be cleaned with soap and water. They will bear more
cleaning than lacquered articles, which are spoiled by frequent rubbing, or by acids, or strong alkalies.
W I N D O W S AND LOOKING-GLASSES.

Dip a moistened rag or flannel into indigo, fuller's earth,
ashes, or rotten-stone, in impalpable powder, with which
smear the glass, and wipe off with a dry soft cloth. Powderblue or whiting, tied up in muslin, and dusted upon the
glass, and cleaned off with chamois leather, also gives glass a
fine polish. The spots in the silvering of old looking-glasses
are caused by damp at the back. Window-panes may be
made to resemble ground glass by daubing them with putty,
or a brush with a little thin paste.
B R A S S AND C O P P E R .

Brass and copper are best cleaned with sweet oil and tripoli, powdered bath-brick, rotten-stone, or red brickdust, rubbed on with flannel and polished with leather. A
strong solution of oxalic acid in water gives brass a fine
colour. Vitriol and spirits of salts soon make brass and
copper very bright, but they very soon tarnish, and consequently require more frequent cleaning. A strong ley of
roche-alum and water will also improve brass.
G R A T E S A N D STOVES.

Grates and stoves are cleaned with black lead mixed with
turpentine, or with stale beer and yellow soap, and polished off.
The finer lead is used dry in lump or powder. The bronzed
work of stoves should be only lightly brushed. Rottenstone,
or fine emery and sweet oil, is used for the bright work of
stoves and polished fire-irons ; the higher the latter are
polished, the less likely are they to rust. To prevent rust in
articles not often used, rub them with sweet oil, and dust over
them fine lime ; or with the following mixture :—To a quart
of cold water, add half a pound of quicklime; let it stand
until the top is clear, when pour off the liquid and stir up with
it some olive oil, until it becomes of a pasty consistence, when
it should be rubbed on the metal articles to be preserved. T o
fill cracks in stove backs, make a paste of wood ashes, salt,
and water. To remove rust, mix tripoli, sulphur, and sweet
oil, and clean the articles with it; or mix boiled soft soap
with emery No. 3, which will also discharge the fire marks

�10
from bright bars. Steel work may also be kept from rust by
varnishing it with turpentine in which is dissolved a small
proportion of India rubber. Polished* fire-irons may.'be best
preserved from rust by being closely wrapped up in strong
brown paper.
KITCHEN V E S S E L S .

The crust on boilers and kettles, arising from the hard
water boiled in them, may be prevented by keeping in the
vessel a marble, or a potato tied in a piece of linen. Tin
plate vessels are cleanly and convenient, but unless dried after
washing, will soon rust in holes. Iron coal-scoops are liable
to rust from the damp of t W coals. The tinning of copper
saucepans must be kept perfectly clean and dry, in which case
they may be used with safety. Copper pans, if put away
damp, or a boiling-copper, if left wet, will become coated with
poisonous crust, or verdigris. Untinned copper or brass vessels, even if scoured bright and clean, are always dangerous.
If made dishes be allowed to cool and stand in copper vessels,
the articles will become poisonous. In the year 1837, a lady
and her family, residing in Paris, were poisoned by partaking
of a stew which had been allowed to stand and get cold in a
copper pan. A German saucepan is best for boiling milk in.
This is an iron saucepan, glazed with white earthenware instead of being tinned, the glaze preventing its tendency to
burn. A stewpan made like it is also preferable to d copper
pan, since simple washing keeps it sweet and clean. A method
of glazing saucepans with earthenware has lately been the
obj ect of a patent in England. Zinc sieves are more easily kept
clean than those made of hair, will last longer, and not rust.
KNIVES.

Knives are best cleaned by rubbing on a flat board covered
with leather, on which is put finely powdered brick-dust.
Never put knives in hot water, for that loosens the handles
and spoils the temper of the steel. For simple cleaning after
use, wipe them only with a damp and then with a dry cloth.
L A M P GLASSES.

If the lamp glasses be ground, burnt spots upon them cannot be removed, but they may be cleaned from the effects of
smoke by washing with soap and water, and then rubbed with
a dry cloth. The glasses should always be ground on the
outside.
FURNITURE.

Mahogany furniture is always best cleaned by continual
rubbing; and no ordinary stuff that may be applied will com-

�11
perisate the want of this requisite. Some furniture is what
is called "French polished;" but this French polish is an
unguent possessed and applied only by cabinet-makers, and
readily to be had by housekeepers. In ordinary circumstances,
therefore, the furniture must be well rubbed, and with some
easily procurable material. The following are, the materials
we suggest:—Take a gill and a half of unboiled linseed oil,
one gill of turpentine, and a tea-spoonful of pounded loaf
sugar. Shake all well together, and rub a portion on the furniture with a piece of flannel, and polish with a linen cloth.
An oil for darkening furniture may be made as follows;—
Mix in one pint of linseed oil an ounce of powdered rose-pink,
to which add one ounce of alkanet root, beaten in a metal
mortar ; let the mixture stand in a warm place for a few
days, when the substances will have settled, and the oil, of a
deep rich colour, may be poured off for use : or mix one ounce
of alkanet root, four ounces of shell-lac varnish, two ounces
of turpentine, and the same quantity of scraped bees' wax,
with a pint of linseed o i l ; and when they have stood a week,
the mixture will be ready for use.
Furniture paste is made by scraping a quarter of a pound
of bees'-wax into half a pint of turpentine, and letting it stand
to dissolve. This will keep the wood light. If, however, a
quarter of a pint of linseed oil be added to the above, the
composition will darken the wood. Another paste, useful
for very light wood, is made as follows:—In a quart of hot
water dissolve six ounces of pearl-ash, add a quarter of a
pound of white wax, and simmer the whole for half an hour
in a pipkin ; take it off the fire, and when it has cooled, the
wax will float upon the surface, and should be worked in a
mortar, with a little hot water, into a soft paste. With this,
furniture maybe highly polished, as may also marble chimneypieces. It is necessary to mention, that furniture cleaned
with paste has the disadvantage of receiving heat-marks more
readily than if polished with linseed-oil, which, however,
requires more time and labour. In any case, the furniture
should be cleansed from grease and stains before polishing is
attempted; and this may be done by washing the wood with
hot beer, or with soap and water. The safest way to heat
furniture paste or oil is to place the vessel containing it in
another holding boiling water upon the fire.
A fine varnish for mahogany or other furniture may be
thus m a d e P u t into a bottle two ounces of gum-sandrac,
one ounce of shell-lac, half an ounce of mastic, half an ounce
of gum-benjamin, one ounce of Venice turpentine, anda pint
of spirits of wine. Colour red with dragon's blood, or yellow

)

\

�12
with saffron. Let it stand in a warm place until the gums
are dissolved, when strain it for use.
VAUNISHING.

Before new furniture is varnished, it should have a coat of
boiled oil, (if wished to be darkened,) or linseed oil, and be
left a day or two to harden; or a thin size, made from isingglass or gum-tragacanth, dissolved in water, or very thin
glue, is used; so that the pores of the wood be filled up, and
both varnish and time be thus saved. A good varnish may
be made by dissolving eight ounces of white wax and half an
ounce of yellow rosin in a pint of spirits of turpentine.
BOTTLES.

Cut a raw potato into small pieces, and put them in the
bottle along with a table-spoonful of salt, and two tablespoonfuls of water.
Shake all well together in the bottle
till every mark is removed, and rinse with clean water. This
will remove stains of wine, green marks of vegetation, and
other discolourations. Hard crust in bottles may be cleaned
off by rinsing with water and small shot. Take care to wash
out all the shot before putting the bottles aside.
PLATE.

Articles of plate, after being used, should be washed in hot
water, or, if stained, they should be boiled, and rinsed and
dried before you attempt to clean them. They should be
carefully handled, else they may receive deep scratches, which
are very difficult to remove.
Besides, the object is not
merely to clean the plate, but to polish it, so that it may
appear almost as brilliant as when it was received new
from the silversmith. For this purpose quicksilver was formerly much used in plate-powder, and it gave the silver great
lustre, which soon, however, disappeared, and the article
became tarnished and blackened.
The best plate-powder consists of dried and finely-sifted
whiting or chalk. The greater part of the whiting sold in
the shops is coarse trash, unfit for rubbing upon plate, and
great care must be taken to procure the finest London whiting, which will not scratch.
Brushes, hard and soft, sponge, and wash leather, are
requisites for cleaning plate; if the powder be mixed with
spirits of wine laid on with a sponge, and rubbed off with
wash-leather, all tarnish will be removed. Salt stains (blackish spots) and sulphur marks from eggs are more difficult to
remove. It is a good plan to boil a soft fine old cloth in
water with some prepared chalk dissolved in it, and to drv

�13
the cloth, and use it for polishing. The soft brush is for the
same purpose, the hard brush being for chased work, edges,
and crests, so that not a portion of dry powder may remain
in them. Plate should in all cases be finished with a fine dry
vvash-leather.
Plated articles should be carefully wiped dry after washing
them, else they will rust or canker at the edges, where the
silver first wears off; and on this account, also, they should
be cleaned as rarely as possible. German silver may be
cleaned in the same manner as plate.
F L A N N E L OK W O O L L E N A R T I C L E S .

Wash them quickly with warm water, with soap. Wring
and shake them well, and hang them up to dry. Do not let
them lie wet. The more quickly they are dried, the less
likely are they to shrink.
SILKS.

No silks look well after washing, however carefully it be
done, and should therefore never be resorted to but from absolute necessity. W e have seen it recommended to sponge
faded silks with warm water and soap, then to rub them with
a dry cloth on a flat board, after which to iron them on the
inside with a smoothing iron. Sponging with spirits will also
improve old black silks. The ironing may be done on the
right side, with thin paper spread over them to prevent
glazing.
B E D FEATHERS.

Put a manageable quantity into a pillow case or bag, which
wash with warm water and soap. Wring out the lather, and
rinse them in clean water. Wring them as dry as possible,
and hang them up to dry. Shake them frequently while
drying. When quite dry, beat them to free them from any
dust. They may be now taken from the bag, and are ready
for use.
LACE.

When lace has lost its colour, soap it well and put it in
cold water, just enough to cover it. If much discoloured,
change the water at the end of twenty-four hours. When
steeped sufficiently, rinse it out; starch it a little; pick it out
as evenly as possible; roll it in a towel, and when nearly dry,
iron it. All kinds of lace veils may be treated in a similar
manner.
*
SCARLET CLOTH.

Pour boiling water upon bran, strain it, and, while hot,
wash the cloth in it, and rinse with hot water. Soap should

�u
not be used. Purple cloth may be washed in hot water and
pure' ley. Saxony or dark print dresses should be washed in
two lathers, and in the second should be poured a little oxgall, which will freshen reds, blacks, and greens; and a handful of salt added to the last rinsing-water will prevent the
colours running;
.
- ,
,
C L E A R STARCHING.

Clear starching is practised as follows:—llinse the articles
in three waters, dry them, and clip them in a thick starch,
previously strained through muslin; squeeze them, shake them
gently, and again hang them up to dry; and when dry, dip
them twice or thrice in clear water, squeeze them, spread
them on a linen cloth, roll tjiem up in it, and let them lie an
hour before ironing them. Some persons put sugar into the
starch, to prevent it sticking while ironing, and others stir the
starch with a candle to effect the same end; we object to
these practices as injurious to the article starched, or as very
nauseous. The best plan to prevent sticking is to make the
starch well, and to have the irons' quite clean and highly
polished.
,

... STAINS.

.

,

Stains of fruit or wine may be generally removed from
linen or cotton cloth by placing the articles over the top of a
pail, and pouring boiling water through them till the marks
disappear.
I N K M A R K S OR I R O N M O U L D S .

Ink marks or iron moulds may be removed by placing a
plate (a pewter One is the best) on the top of a basinful of
boiling water; then spread the articles on the plate; wet the
spot, and rub it with a small quantity of the salts of lemon;
as the article dries, the stain will disappear. If this fail, repeat the operation. A small box of salts of lemon will be
found very useful in a household.
P A I N T OR G R E A S E SPOTS.

Paint or grease spots may be removed from woollen cloth
by turpentine. Smith's scouring drops is a liquid sold in
small bottles, which will also be found efficacious in removing
oil or grease marks ; it is more expensive than turpentine,
but has a less offensive odour.
T o E X T R A C T G R E A S E EROM S I L K .

As soon after the discovery of the injury as possible, hold
the part firmly, and with a clean soft white cloth, or an old

�15
cambric handkerchief, rub the spot briskly, changing the portions of the handkerchief frequently and in a minute or two
the spot will disappear. On silks which fray easily, this plan
will be unsuitable.
T o R E M O T E A T I G H T STOPPER.

It frequently happens that the stopper of a glass bottle or
decanter, becomes fixed in its place so firmly, that the exertion of force sufficient, to withdraw it would endanger the
vessel. In this case, if a cloth be wetted with hot water, and
applied to the neck of the bottle, the glass will expand, and
the neck will be enlarged, so as to allow1 the stopper to be
easily withdrawn.
.

ECONOMICAL F U E L .

.

,

In places where coal is scarce and dear, a tolerably good
fuel may be made by mixing the culm or refuse dross of coal
with clay, and moistening the whole with water—masses in
the form of bricks or balls • may be made, which, when dry,
will, burn with an intense heat. Where peat'prevails, that
article may be easily charred by burning in a covered pit or
stove ; and this charred peat will be found to give a great
heat when used in an open fire. The Dutch make much use
of their turf in this manner. Another economical fuel, easily
procurable where there are woods of Scotch firs, consists of
fir cones or tops, which contain a great quantity of solid
woody matter in addition to the resinous, and are excellently
adapted for domestic fires.
T o LIGHT A FIRE.

To light a fire, clear the ashes from the grate, leaving a
few cinders for a foundation, upon which put a piece of dry
crumpled brown paper, and lay on a few small sticks crosswise,
then some of larger size, and on them a few pieces of coal,
and next the large cinders; and when the flames have caught
the coal, add a backing of small coal and cinders. When the
fire has become low, stir it together, but do not turn the large
cinders; clear the front of the lower bar to admit air, and
pass the poker into the bottom of the fire, to clear it of
ashes; and then with tongs put on a few large pieces of
coal towards the front of the fire, but not on the upper,
else the fire will smoke. Coals should not be thrown on,
but put on gently with a scoop or shovel ; and even the
smallest ashes may be burnt at the back of the fire, if they be
covered with small coal. The best and quickest mode of restoring a neglected fire is to stir out the ashes, and. with the
tongs to fill up the spaces between the bars with cinders. If

�16
carefully done, it is surprising how soon this process will produce a glowing fire.
Ashes and small cinders mixed with water into a mass, and
put on the back of a fire with a few coals, burn well, so that
ashes may thus be entirely burnt up. In stoves under
boilers, this mixture is very useful, as it lasts long, with little
addition.
SMOKY CHIMNEYS.

The cause of smokiness in chimneys are various; but all
.re connected with the properties of air and heat, for the
smoke is only particles of culm ascending through the agency
of heated air. To make a chimney vent well, the column of
heated air from the fire must not be entangled with cold air
from beneath nor retarded by cold air coming down the
chimney. To effect these objects, the fire-place must not be
much larger than the grate, and the chimney must be of a
certain length and bent. The great leading cause of smokiness is cold air somehow or other mixing with the warm air
about the mouth or throat of the chinmey, and so causing a
sluggishness in the ascent, or no ascent at all. Therefore, the
nearer the air is made to pass the fire on all sides, the more
rarefied it will be; and the less vacancy there is in the chimney-place, it will ascend with the greater rapidity. A proper
contraction of the mouth of the chimney, at the same time
allowing the fire to be fed freely with air, will be found in
most instances to cure smoke. Of late, certain contrivances
called dampers, by which the chimney throat can be narrowed,
have been the means of effecting draughts, and so curing
smoke. It should be noted, that in contracting chimneythroats, the contraction should not be all at once, but at first
gradual, and then straight upward, so as not to allow a volume
of cold air to lurk in a hollow above. A chimney being wide
at bottom, and gradually narrowing towards the next storey,
allows the coldish air to hang about the lower parts, by which,
when a gust of wind comes, the smoke is driven back into the
room. This kind of smokiness is the most teasing of all the
forms of chimney diseases. Every little puff of wind sends a
smaller or larger quantity of smoke into the apartment, and
often when it is least expected. Perhaps this kind of smokiness is not in all cases caused by wrong construction, but arises
from the situation of the house; and of this we shall immediately say a few words.
If a funnel of a chimney be made too narrow to afford an
easy passage to the top, the smoke will then naturally be
forced into the room to find some other passage; this defect

%

�17
is very common, and the remedy troublesome and difficult.
The most effectual cure, if the situation will admit, is to build
a small additional flue, and open a hole into it from the back
of the chimney, near the level of the mantel-piece, slanting
upwards in an easy direction ; this supplemental flue must be
carried to the top of the building to receive the surplus of
the smoke, and will prove a certain cure. If the situation
will not allow of this expedient, the fire-place may be contracted both in breadth and height, a smaller grate used, and
the chimney heightened at the top ; which will oblige the air
to pass close over the fire, and carry up the smoke with greater
rapidity, for the quicker the current, the less room it requires.
Should the chimney still smoke, a blower, or front plate, to
put on and take off at pleasure, will be of use. But it
none of these prescriptions answer, then something must be
done to improve the current of air towards the fire. This
brings us to a consideration of the want of ventilation in the
room.
If the chimney and fire-place be faultless, and yet smoke,
it is almost certain that there is a want of ventilation. In
ordinary circumstances, as much air is admitted by chinks in
windows and doors as will feed a fire; but if the room be
rendered very close by closing as many chinks as possible,
how is the fire to receive air ? According to the plan on which
houses are generally built, ventilation is left to be a matter of
chance. To ventilate an old house is therefore no easy task.
The following plans are worth considering, for they have been
found to answer:—Contrive to bring a small tube from the
external air, or from a staircase or lobby, to a point beneath
the grate, so as to cause a free current of air to reach the fire.
If the mouth of the tube below the grate be topped with a
cowl, the ashes will be prevented from falling into it. Some
years ago, the rooms of a public office in Edinburgh were
completely cured of smoke by this simple contrivance, after
all other means had failed. Another plan consists in perforating small holes in the cornice or roof, for the air to gain admission ; but, unfortunately, unless care be taken to prevent
colds, the cure is apt to be worse than the disease.
Cases are by no means uncommon of fire-places giving out
a puff of smoke every time the door of the room is shut. The
cause of this kind of smokiness is the want of ventilation in
the room. In shutting the door, it pulls out a certain quantity of air, which cannot be afforded to be lost, or it causes
such distraction of the current towards the fire, that the equilibrium that carries up the smoke is destroyed, and a puff
downwards—in other words, a rush of air loaded with smoke

�18
from the chimney—is the consequence. It will be remarked,
that this smokiness occurs most frequently when the door is
on the same side of the room as the fire-place. W e should
therefore advise house-planners to avoid this bad arrangement. If possible, let the door be on a different side from
that in which the fire is placed. Most houses in which the
chimneys go up the middle walls instead of the gables, have
the fault we mention. A remedy for this smokiness is to contract the mouth of the chimney, and, if possible, heighten the
stalk; for if the chimney be pretty long, the heated air ascending it goes with such a force that the outer heavy air cannot get down, at least not to so great an extent as to cause a
puff when the door is shutting. In some cases, the cause of
the disease will be found to be air rushing up behind the grate,
if a register, and then coming down to supply the fire, the action of the door disturbing the current. This is therefore an
argument for always taking care to build register stoves quite
close behind, not leaving the smallest crevice for air to steal
up the chimney without first going through the fire.
In erecting chimneys, it should be a rule to carry them up
a good way in a perpendicular direction, before making a turn,
by which means the heated air gains a force in its primary vertical ascent, which carries it,over future difficulties. In walls
in which the fire-place of one storey is immediately below the
fire-place^,above, it is impossible to get a perfect straight for
any great length; therefore this must be left to the judgment
of the builder. It is also advantageous for ail chimneys to
have a bend in them before reaching the top, and a garret
chimney should have two bends. For want of attention to this
top bending, many cottage and small villa chimneys smoke.
The use of bends is obvious. Strong, sudden, and accidental
gusts of wind sometimes enter, and beat into the top of the
chimney; a turning or bend, therefore, will break the force of
the wind, and prevent it repelling the heated air downwards.
But if the chimney is straight, and the gust meet with no interruption, it will stop the passage of the smoke for a while,
and of course force what rises from the fire immediately into
the chamber. It is to be observed that the farther the wind
gets down the funnel the greater strength will be required to
repel i t ; therefore the nearer to the top the bend or winding
is, the better. Also, if there is a storm of wind, with heavy
showers of hail, snow, or rain, falling perpendicularly in great
drops, the first bend or turning will, in part, stop their progress ; but if the funnel is perpendicular all the way down, the
great drops of hail, show, and rain, will fall freely to the bottom, repelling the smoke into the room; and if the funnel is

�19
foul, great quantities of soot will be driven down. These reasons recommend a bend in some part of the funnel as absolutely necessary.
Garret chimneys are more liable to smoke than any other
in the house, owing to the shortness of the funnel : for when
the composition of rarified air and smoke has made its way
up a high funnel, it forms a strong column, and to repel it requires a proportionably great force; but in a garret chimney
this strong column cannot be obtained; therefore, what cannot be had from nature must be aimed at by art. The fault
in most garret chimneys is being carried up in a straight direction from bottom to top in a slovenly manner, and with
funnels as large as any in the house; whereby the little internal rarefied air has the whole immediate pressure of the
atmosphere to resist, which, in general, is too powerful for it.
But a garret or cottage chimney carried up and executed in a
proper manner, with due proportion in every part, according
to the size of the room, and the funnel in an easy crooked direction, will draw and be as clear from smoke as any other.
T o PURIFY WATER.

To purify water, put into a hogshead of it a large tablespoonful of powdered alum, stir it, and in a few hours the impurities will be sent to the bottom. A pailful of four gallons
may be purified by a single tea-spoonful of alum. Freshlyburnt charcoal is also an excellent sweetener of water.
T O FILTER WATER.

Put into an earthen vessel (such as sugar-bakers use to form
the loaves in, with a small hole at the bottom or pointed end)
some pieces of sponge, and on them a sufficient number of
small clean peebles to quarter-fill the vessel. Hang this filter
end downward, in a barrel with the head out, leaving a space
of about two or three inches between the end of the filter and
the bottom of the barrel* The upper part of the filter should
be kept a little above the top of the barrel, which must always
be kept full of water. The sediment of tho water Will remain
at the bottom of the barrel, and the pure water will rise
through the sponge and pebbles to the vacant part of the
filter. It may be hung in a cistern, or water-butt if more
convenient. The pebbles and sponge should be cleansed occasionally.
Another economical filter may be made by taking out the
head of a cask, setting it upright, and at a distance of about
one-third from the bottom putting in a shelf or partition
pierced with small holes ; this shelf being covered with

�20
pebbles, upon which is a layer of fresh charcoal made front
bones; and over this lay fine sand, to the depth of an inch,
covered with another layer of pebbles ; and upon this should
be placed another shelf, pierced with holes, to prevent the
pebbles, sand, and charcoal being disturbed by the water
which is poured or runs in at the top of the cask; and after
passing through the filter, is drawn t&gt;ff by a crane placed a*
the bottom of the cask.

VERMIN.

The best plan for preventing the attacks of vermin in
houses is to keep the house scrupulously clean; for where there
is cleanliness and ordinary precautions, no vermin will generate or exist.
R A T S AND M I C E .

These might in some instances be completely prevented
from encroaching in dwellings by giving a solid foundation to
the house, cutting off the approach by grating the drains, but
especially by filling up all open spaces beneath pavements
and in walls and partitions. Mice might be effectually kept
out by only filling up the spaces behind skirting boards in
rooms. These vacant spaces are invariably the habitations of
mice, and the first thing any person should do in entering into
possession of a domicile, is to cause all the spaces behind the
skirting-boards and wainscoats to be filled with plaster. Where
mice and rats have gained a footing in a house, they should
be taken off by a cat or trap, and when one kind of trap fails,
another may be tried. All schemes for poisoning them with
arsenic or other ingredients are dangerous, and cannot be recommended.
BUGS.

These pests exist only in dirty houses. A carefui housewife or servant will soon completely destroy them. The surest
method of destruction is to catch them individually when they
attack the person in bed. When their bite is felt, instantly
rise and light a candle and capture them. This may be
troublesome, but if there be not a great number, a few nights
will finish them. When there is a large number, and they
have gained a lodgment in the timbers, take the bed in pieces,
and fill in all the apertures and joints with a mixture of soft
soap and Scotch snuff. A piece of wicker-work, called a bug-

�21
placed
bed, forms a receptacle for
i . ' , and then they may be daily caught till no more are
left. Fumigations are very dangerous, and rarely effectual,
therefore attempt no such project. Oil-painting a wall is a
means of excluding and destroying them.
t

clie

FLEAS.

There is no way of ridding a bed or house of these vermin
but excessive cleanliness. Keep the floors well swept and
washed, and if you have a dog, comb and wash it frequently.
Fleas are bred on the ground, or among dust.
LICE.

Lice are now almost unknown in England. Wherever they
are found, there certainly also is found dirtiness. Ignorant
people imagine that these nauseous vermin breed spontaneously; this is a gross error. By cleanliness they are completely prevented;.. and the more warm the climate, so is the
necessity for cleanliness greater.
B E E T L E S , COCKROACHES, AND C R I C K E T S .

These may be caught in traps. A simple trap for them is
a glazed basin or pie-dish half-filled with sweetened beer or
milk, and to the edge of which a piece of wood is laid from
the floor as a gangway. Do not attempt poisoning or fumigation.
FLIES.

It is difficult to rid a house of flies by any other plan than
by poisoning, and that is too dangerous to be recommended.
A composition of milk, sugar, and pepper, will attract and kill
them, and so will a decoction ofquasia; but both cause them
to make offensive marks on the walls and furniture before they
die. Gilt frames and chandeliers should be shrouded in thin
yellow gauze or paper, in situations where the flies are likely
to spoil them. Trees about a house form a harbour for flies,
as well as dirt of all kinds. Cleanliness and airiness are the
best preventives.
MOTHS.

The best way to preserve furs or worsteds from mothg is to
sew them closely up in a bag of new unwashed linen; if this
is not done, the next best is to take the articles frequently out
and brush and air them. The odour of camphor, shavings of
Russia leather, lavender, &amp;c., are much less efficacious than
they are supposed to be. Kill every flying moth which you
see.

�;

. '.SLUGS. .

.

Take .1 quantity of cabbage leaves, and either put them into
a warm oven, or hold them before a fire till they are quite
soft; then rub them with unsalted butter, or any kind of fresh
dripping, and lay them in the places infested with slugs. In
a few hours the leaves will ,be found covered with snails and
slugs, which may then be destroyed in any way you think fit.

DOMESTIC MANUFACTURES.
The attempt to make all sorts of articles for domestic use
is now far from economical, as the time and expense bestowed
upon them are often of greater amount than what would buy
the things ready from shops. W e therefore confine our directions to articles which may require to be manufactured in
families at a great distance from towns, or for the families of
emigrants in remote settlements.
B L A C K I N G FOR SHOES.

There arc many ways of making this article, the chief ingredients ; employed being ivory black, vinegar or sour beer,
sugar, a little sweet oil, and oil of vitriol. A good blacking
may be made as follows:—Mix three ounces of ivory-black,
two ounces of treacle, a table-spoonful of sweet oil, one ounce
of vitriol, one ounce of gum-arabic dissolved in water, and a
pint of vinegar.
BLACKING-BALLS.

For blacking-balls mix one pound of ivory-black, one pound
of lamp-back, a quarter of a pound of gum-arabic dissolved in
water, six Ounces of brown sugar, half an ounce., of melted
glue, and a quart of water; and make into balls. A fine
blacking for dress-shoes may be made by well beating two
eggs, and adding a table-spoonful of spirits of wine, a lump of
sugar, and ivory-black to thicken. This blacking may also be
used for restoring the black leather seats and backs of chairs,
etc. In should be laid on and polished as other blacking, and
then left a day to harden.
B L A C K I N G FOR H A R N E S S .

Melt two ounces of ; mutton suet with six ounces of befes'wax ; add six ounces of sugar-candy, and two ounces of soft
soap dissolved in water, and one ounce of indigo finely pow-

�23
dered; and when melted and well mixed, add a gill of turpentine. Lay it on the harness with a sponge, and polish oft
with a brush.
-

"' i

vv

CEMENT.

Various preparations are used for mending broken china,
earthenware, and glass. The most successful are as follows:—
Beat the white of an egg with quicklime, in impalpable powder,
into a paste; to which is sometimes added a little whey, made
by mixing vinegar and milk. A little isinglass, dissolved in
mastic varnish, is another cement. Nature supplies some
cements ready to our hands—as the juice of garlic, and the
white slime of large snails; and it lias been stated in a respectable scientific journal, that a broken flint has been joined
so effectually with this snail cement, that when dashed npon
a stone pavement, the flint broke elsewhere than at the
cemented parts. In their anxiety to unite broken articles,
persons generally defeat themselves by spreading the cement
too thickly upon the edges of the article, whereas the least
possible quantity should be Used, so as to bring the edges almost close together; and this may be aided by heating the
fragments to be joined..
•
'

"

•

•

~

' PASTE.

7

Paste is useful m a house for preparing walls, cupboards,
boxes, labelling, &amp;c. Dr. M'Culloch, of Edinburgh, employs
" paste made of flour in the usual way, but rather thick, with
a proportion of brown sugar, and a small quantity of corrosive
sublimate. The use of the sugar is to keep it flexible, so as
to prevent it scaling off from smooth surfaces; and that of the
corrosive sublimate—independent of preserving it from insects
—is an effectual check against its fermentation. This salt
does not, however, prevent the formation of mouldiness ; but
a drop or two of oil of lavender, peppermint, or anise-seed, is a
complete security againgst this.
W A T E R P R O O F STWTI: TOR SHOES.

In winter, or during wet weather, shoes may be rendered
durable by applying to the soles and seams a composition made
of the following materials:—Half a pint of boiled linseed Oil,
two table-spoonfuls of turpentine, one ounce of bees'-wax, and
a quarter of an ounce of Burgundy pitch. Melt the whole
together, and apply with a Brush-before the fire. • Repeat the
application till the soles will absorb no more. Neats'-foot oil,
alone, will be found an excellent preservation of shoes in wet
weather.

�24
INK.

An excellent ink suitable for writing with steel pens, which
it does not corrode, may be made of the following articles:—
Sixty grains of caustic soda, a pint of water, and as much Indian ink as you think fit for making a proper blackness.
BOTTLE W A X .

A good kind of bottle wax or cement may be cheaply made
as f o l l o w s P u t into an iron ladle half a pound of rosin, two
ounces of bees'-wax, and when melted over the fire, stir in
Venetian red, lamp-black, or other colouring; and apply
while hot. If kept for after use, melt with a candle as usual
when applied.
POTATO-STARCH.

Wash and peel a gallon of good potatoes, grate them into
a pail of water, stir frequently, and then let them settle. On
the following day the starch will be found at the bottom of the
pail; when pour off the water, add fresh, stir as before, and
let it subside a second time; when pour off the water, and
dry the sediment in the sun or a slow oven. An excellent
starch may also be made by setting in a cool place the water
in which rice has been boiled (though not in a cloth,) which
will in twenty-four hours become a strong starch.
POTASHES.

Settlers in the backwoods of America, or other woody
regions, have an opportunity of manufacturing potash, an
article of great use and considerable value. A vast quantity
of this substance is annually made in Canada, and exported
to Great Britain. Potashes are made from the ashes of burnt
trees. In burning timber to clear the land, the ashes are carefully preserved, and put in barrels, or other vessels with holes
in the bottom; and water being poured over them, a liquid or
alkali is run off; this ley being boiled in large boilers, the
watery particles evaporate, and leave what is called black
salts, a sort of residuum, which, when heated to a high degree,
becomes fused, and finally, when cool, assumes the character
of potash.
By these potashes the Canadians make their own soap; the
ley of a barrel of ashes, boiled along with ten pounds of tallow, till it is of a proper consistence, produces about forty
)ounds of very good soft soap. It is related, that when the
and has been covered with heavy timber of a hard nature,
there is such a quantity of ashes produced that their value will
pay for clearing the land.

f

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                <text>The Family Receipt Book; A selection of receipts, advices, and directions, relative to Housekeeping, Cleaning, &amp;amp;c, from the most approved sources.</text>
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                <text>&lt;a title="niversity of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks" href="http://special.lib.gla.ac.uk/chapbooks/search/"&gt;University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks&amp;nbsp;&lt;/a&gt;</text>
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                    <text>FOUR SONGS
CHERRY-CHEEKED PATTY.
JUDY O'FLANNIKIN.
NO PEACE ABOUT THE HOUSE.
MAGGIE LAUDER.

GLASGOW:
PRINTED FOR THE BOOKSELLERS.

68.

�SONGS.

CHERRY-CHEEKED PATTY.
Down in yon vale I lives so snug,
Thev call me Giles the ploughman's boy;
At the sound of the horn
I rise in the morn,
And I whittle, I whistle, and whoop gee wo I cry*
My work being done, to the lawn then* I fly,
Where the lads and the lasses all look very sly
And I'ze deeply in love with a girl, it is true,
'Cause I knows what I knows, but I munna tell you;
Then I'll whistle, I'll whistle, and of all the girls I ever
did see,
Oh ! cherry-cheeked Patty for me.
The squire, though so great, so happy mayn't be
As simple Giles, the ploughman's boy;
At the sound of the horn
I rise in t ie morn,
And I whistle, I whistle, and whoop gee wo I cry;
There's cherry-cheeked Patty, who lives in the vale,
That I help o'er the stile with her milking-pail,
And she has a right notion of me, it is true,
'Cause I knows, &amp;c.

�3
So able and strong, and willing to work,
And when the lark rises, off trudge I ;
At the sound of the horn
I rise in the morn,
And I whistle, I whistle, and whoop gee wo I cry.
There's the lord of the valley, he tries in vain,
And does all he can my Patty to gain,
Let him do what he will, it never will do,
'Cause I knows, &amp;c.
My Patty consented next week to be
The wife of Giles the ploughman's boy;
Then my cows up I'll call,
And I'll harness old Ball,
And I'll whistle, I'll whistle, and whoop gee wo I'll cry.
And when from the church we do trip it away,
Along with the old ones we'll spend the whole day,
But night coming on, we'll bid them adieu,
'Cause I knows, &amp;c.

JUDY O'FLANNIKIN.
O whack ! Cupid's a mannikin,
Smack on my back he hit me a polter,
Good lack! Judy O'Flannikin,
Dearly she loves neat Looney Mactwolter.
Judy's my darling, my kisses she suffers,
She's an heiress, that's clear,
For her father sells beer,
He keeps the sign of the Cow and the Snuffers.

�4
She's so smart,
From my heart,
I cannot bolt her,
Oh whack, Judy O'Flannikin !
She is the girl for Looney Mactwolter.
Ochone! good news I need a bit,
We'd correspond, but learning would choke her,
Mavrone! I cannot read a bit,
Judy can't tell a pen from a proker.
Judy's so constant, I'll never forsake her,
She's as true as the moon,
Only one afternoon
I caught her asleep with a hump-back'd shoemaker.
Oh! she's so smart,
From my heart
I cannot bolt her,
Oh, whack! Judy O'Flannikin!
She is the girl for Looney Mactwolter

NO PEACE ABOUT THE HOUSE.
There is no peace about the house,
In kitchen, parlour, hall,
There is no comfort in the house
On Saturday at all.
Where'er you turn, a noise assails
Brushes, brooms and mops,
Besides a host of pans and pails,
For various stinking slops.

�5
Then there's rubbing, scrubbing, tearing, swearing, echoing every way;—
Of all the days throughout the week, the worst is
Saturday.
Hark, is that dread thunder near ?
Or noisy drum and fife ?
Oh no, the music that I hear
Is charwoman and wife;
Both laughing, scolding, talking, singing,
'Gad, there's such a din.
That all Babel's workmen ringing,
Conquer'd must give in—
To their rubbing, scrubbing, tearing, swearing, echoing
every way,—
Of all the days within the week, the worst is Saturday.
In apron blue, now comes your belle,
And gown well stored with holes ;
For colour, it might passing well
Claim kindred with the coals.
Then she says, ' You know, my dear,
Some make their husbands rue,
By taking their good clothes to wear,
When any thing will do,
For their scrubbing, rubbing, tearing, wearing/ O, curse
them all, I say,—
Of all the days throughout the week, the worst is Saturday.
Begrimed with dust, with dirt and grease,
She now sits down to dine;

�6
At banyan day, of bread and cheese
You must not now repine;
Your goods and chattels now displaced,
All in confusion stand;
Some are broke, and some defac'd,
By each destructive hand,
With their rubbing, scrubbing tearing, swearing, sounding every way,—
Of all the days that's in the week, the worst is Saturday.
At length, thank Fate, the warfare's o'er,
But now, the peevish trump
Insists that all across the floor
We must hop, skip and jump,
For fear that milk-white boards should soil,
Or furniture bewray,
Oh, wo to him that dares to spoil
The work of Saturday;
After rubbing, scrubbing, tearing, swearing, all their
time away,—
Of all the days that make the week, the worst is Saturday.
Then to avoid a din and noise,
For rational delight,
We haste to join some jolly boys,
On Saturday at night;
Then we're met—a jovial set,
We drive dull care away;
In harmony we soon forget
The woes of Saturday.

�7
And their rubbing, scrubbing, tearing, swearing, all the
live-long day;
But the night of mirth will soon requite the woes or
Saturday.

M A G G I E LAUDER.
Wha wadna be in love
Wi* bonnie Maggie Lauder ?
A piper met her gaun to Fife,
And spier'd what was't they ca'd her ?
Right scornfully she answer'd him,
Begone, you hallanshaker;
Jog on your gate, you bladderskate,
My name is Maggie Lauder.
Maggie, quoth he, and by my bags,
I'm fidging fain to see thee,
Sit down by me, my bonny bird,
In troth I winna steer thee:
For I'm a piper to my trade,
My name is Rob the Ranter,
The lasses loup like they were daft,
When I blaw up my chanter.
Piper, quoth Meg, hae you your bags
Or is your drone in order ?
If ye be Rab, I've heard of you,
Live you upon the border ?

�8
The lasses a' bailh far and near
Hae heai d of Rob the Ranter,
I'll shake my foot wi' right good will,
Gif you'll blaw up your chanter.
Then to his bags he flew with speed,
About the drone he twisted,
Meg up and walloped o'er the green,
For brawly could she frisk it.
Weel done, quoth he : play up, quoth she;
Weel bobb'd, quoth Rob the Ranter,
'Tis worth my while to play indeed,
When I hae sic a dancer.
Weel hae you play'd your part, quoth Meg,
Your cheeks are like the crimson;
There's nane in Scotland plays sae weel,
Since we lost Habby Simson.
I've lived in Fife baith maid and wife,
These ten years and a quarter;
Gin you should come to Anster Fair,
Spier ye for Maggy Lauder.
For a' the talk and loud reports
That ever ga'ed against her,
Meg proves a true and carefu' wife,
As ever was in Anster.
An' since the marriage knot was tied,
Rob swears he couldna want her,
For he loes Maggie as his life,
An' Meg loes Rob the Ranter.

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                    <text>THE

PENNY-WORTH OF WIT'S

GARLAND,
IN THREE PARTS.

F A R T I.-—Showing how a Merchant was deluded from
his Lady by a Harlot.
P A R T I I . — H o w he sailed into a far Country.
P A R T I I I , — H o w he returned to the British shore.

GLASGOW:
P R I N T E D FOR THE

i».

BOOKSELLE&amp;&amp;

�T H E PENNY W O R T H OF WIT'S G A R L M B .
P A R T I.
Here is a penny worth of wit,
F o r those that ever went astray?
If warning they will take by me
'Twill do them good some other day.
It is a touch stone of true love,
Betwixt a harlot and a w i f e ;
The former doth destructive prove,
The latter yields the joys of life.
A s in this book you may behold,
Set forth by William Lane,
A wealthy merchant, brave and bold,
W h o did a harlot long maintain.
A l t h o u g h a virtuous wife he had,
Likewise a youthful daughter dear,
W h i c h might have made his heart full glad,
Y e t he seldom would them come near.
The finest silks that could be bought,
N a y , jewels, rubbies, diamonds, rings,
H e to his wanton harlot bought,
W i t h many other costly things.
She'd still receive them with a smile
W h e n he came from the roaring seas.
A n d said, with words as smooth as oil,
M y dearest come and take thy ease;
T o my soft bed of linen fine,
Thou art right welcome love, said she,
B o t h I and all that e'er was mine
still at thy devotion be.

�3
Aye that I will thou needs not fear,
And so embraced him with a kiss,
Then took the wealth, and said, my dear
I'll have a special care of this.
To her he said, my joy, my dear,
With me what venture wilt thou send,
A good return thou needs not fear,
I'll be thy factor and thy friend.
In goods, my dear jewel, I'll send above
Ten pounds, which you shall take on board,
I know that unto me my love
A treble gain thou wilt afford.
This said, next to the wife he goes
And asked her in scornful ways,
What venture she will now propose
To send by him for merchandise.
I'll send a penny love by thee,
Be sure to take great care of it,
When you're in foreign part, said she,
Pray buy a penny worth of wit.
He put the money up secure,
A n d said I'll take a special care
T o lay it out you may be sure,
So to his miss he did repair.
And told her what he was to buy,
A t which she laughed his wife to scorn;
On board he went immediately,
And set to sea that very morn.

�riSl

4
P A R T II.
N o w were they gone with merry hearts,
The merchant and his jovial crew,
From port to port in foreign parts
T o trade as they were wont to do.
A t length when he had well bestowed
The cargo which was outward bound,
He did his trading vessel load
W i t h rich treasures which he found.
A s this merchandise did vend,
They turned the gems and golden ore,
W h i c h crowned his labour with content,
H e never was so rich before.
The wanton harlot's venture then,
Did run to great account likewise,
For every pound she would have ten,
Such was their lucky merchandise.
The merchant then with laughter mov'd,
Said he for wit had never sought,
M y harlot's venture is approved,
But of my wife's I never thought.
She bid me use my utmost skill
T o buy a penny-worth of wit,
B u t I have kept the penny still
A n d ne'er so much as thought of it.
A n aged father sitting by,
W h o s e venerable locks were grey,
Straight made the merchant this reply,
Hear me a word or two I pray.

�Thy harlot in prosperity,
She will embrace thee for thy g o l d ;
But if in want and misery
You'll nought but frowns from her behold.
And ready ,to betray thy life,
W h e n wretched, naked, poor, and low,
But thy true hearted faithful wife
Will stand by thee in well or woe.
If thou will prove the truth of this,
Strip off thy gaudy rich array,
And so return to thy lewd miss,
Declare that thou wast cast away.
Thy riches buried in the main,
Besides as you passed through a wood,
One of your servants you had slain
For which your life in danger stood ; Beseech her for to shelter thee,
Declare to her you so depend,
And then, alas, full soon you'll see
How far she'll prove a faithful friend.
Then if she frowns go to thy wife,
Tell her this melancholy t h i n g ;
W h o labours most to save thy life,
Let her be most in thy esteem.
Further the merchant then reply'd,
Y o u must this single penny take,
And when I have passed the ocean wide,
A proof of this I mean to make.

�6
P A R T III.
\i

: : b. •

/ i i 'it V

With full sail to sea they went,
Neptune the golden cargo bore,
Thro' roaring waves, to their content
A t length they reached the British, shor
he merchant put on poor array,
The very worst of ragged clothes,
And then without the least delay
He to his wanton harlot goes.
He cried no man was ere so crossed
As I have been, sweet heart delight,
My ship and all I had is lost,
Without thy aid I'm ruined quite.
My loss is great, yet that's not all,
One of my servants I have slain,
As we did both at variance fall,
Some shelter let me here obtain.
1 dare not now go near my wife
Whom I have wronged for many years^
Into thy hands I'll put my life,
Take pity on my melting tears
Y e bloody villian, she replied,
Do'nt in the least on me depend,
Begone, or as I live, she cried,
I for an officer will send.

�7
Then to his loving wife he came,
Both poor and naked, in distress,
He told her all the very same,
Y e t she received him ne'ertbeless.
My dear, she cried, since it is so,
Take comfort in thy loving wife;
All that I have shall freely go
To gain a pardon for thy life.
I'll lodge thee in a place secure,
Where 1 will daily nourish thee.
Unto his virtuous wife, he said,
My jewel set thy heart at rest.
Behold I have no servant slain,
N o r have T suffered any loss;
Enough I have us to maintain,
The ocean seas no more I'll cross.
M y loaded ship lies near the shore,
With gold and jewels richly fraught,
So much I never had before,
The penny-worth of wit I've bought.
Once more he to his harlot goes
With fourteen sailors brave and bold.
All clothed in new and Costly clothes
Of silk and embroider'd gold.
The miss when she his
Did offer him a kind
But he With wrath and
Did straight upbraid

pomp beheld,
embrace,
anger filled,
her to her face.

�8
But she with smiles there words expressed,
I have a faithful love for thee,
What e'er I said was but a jest,
W h y didst thou go so soon from me ?
T w a s full time to go from thee,
Y o u have another love in store,
Whom you have furnished with my gold,
And jewels which I brought on shore.
l i s false, she cried, I have them all;
With that the merchant straight replied
L a y them before me and I shall,
Be soon convinced and satisfied.
Then up she ran and brought thein down,
His jewels, gold, and rubbies. bright;
He seized them all, and with a frown,
He bad the wanton jilt good night.
When he had seized the golden purse
And swept up every precious stone,
She cried, what! will you rob me thus ?
Y e s that I will, of what's my own.
Y o u wanted to betray my life
But thanks to God. there's no such fear;
These jewels shall adorn my wife*
Henceforth your house I'll not come near.
Home he returned to his sweet wife,
A n d told her all that he had done;
E'er since they live a happy life,
And he'll to harlots no more run.

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B a t she with smiles there words expressed,
I have a faithful love for thee,
W h a t e'er I said was but a jest,
W h y didst thou g o so soon from me ?
T w a s full time to go from tliee,
Y o u have another love in store,
W h o m you have furnished with my gold,
A n d jewels which I brought on shore.
T i s false, she cried, I have them all;
W i t h that the merchant straight replied
L a y them before me and I shall,
Be soon convinced and satisfied.
Then up she ran and brought them down,
His jewels, gold, and rubbies b r i g h t ;
H e seized them all, and with a frown,
He bad the wanton jilt good night.

THE

PENNY-WORTH OF

W Y F &amp;

GARLAND,
IN THREE PARTS.

P A R T I . — S h o w i n g how a M e r c h a n t was deluded from
his L a d y by a Harlot.
P A R T I I . — H o w he sailed into a far Country.
P A R T III,—^How he returned to the British shore.

W h e n he had seized the golden purse
A n d swept up every precious stone,"
She cried, w h a t ! will you rob me t h u s ?
Y e s that I will, of what's my own.
Y o u wanted to betray my life
But thanks to God there's no such f e a r ;
These jewels shall adorn my wife,
Henceforth your house F i l not come near.
H o m e he returned to his sweet wife,
A n d told her all that he had done;
E'er since they live a happy life,
A n d he'll to harlots no more run.

GLASGOW:
PRINTED FOR THE
t%

BOOKSELLEB&amp;

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7
T H E PENNY W O R T H OF WIT'S GARLAND.
P A R T I.
Here is a penny worth of wit,
F o r those that ever went astray,
If warning they will take by me
'Twill do them good some other day.
It is a touch stone of true love,
Betwixt a harlot and a w i f e ;
The former doth destructive prove,
The latter yields the joys of life.
A s in this book you may behold,
Set forth by William Lane,
A wealthy merchant, brave and bold,
W h o did a harlot long maintain.
A l t h o u g h a virtuous wife he had,
Likewise a youthful daughter dear,
W h i c h might have made his heart full glad,
Y e t he seldom would them come near.
The finest silks that could be bought,
N a y , jewels, rubbies, diamonds, rings,
H e to his wanton harlot bought,
W i t h many other costly things.
She'd still receive them with a smile
W h e n he came from the roaring seas.
A n d said, with words as smooth as oil,
M y dearest come and take thy ease;
T o my soft bed of linen fine,
Thou art right welcome love, said she,
B o t h I and all that e'er was mine
Shal 1 stil* at thy devotion be.

Then to his loving wife he came,
Both poor and naked, in distress,
H e told her all the very same,
Y e t she received him ne'ertheless.
M y dear, she cried, since it is so,
Take comfort in thy loving wife;
A l l that I have shall freely g o
T o gain a pardon for thy life.
I'll lodge thee in a place secure,
W h e r e I will daily nourish thee.
U n t o his virtuous wife, he said,
M y jewel set thy heart at rest.
Behold I have no servant slain,
N o r have I suffered any loss;
E n o u g h I have us to maintain,
The ocean seas no more I'll cross.
M y loaded ship lies near the shore,
With gold and jewels richly fraught,
So much I never had before,
The penny-worth of wit I've bought.
Once more he to his harlot goes
W i t h fourteen sailors brave and bold,
A l l clothed in new and costly clothes
Of silk and embroider'd gold.
The miss when she his
Did offer him a kind
B u t he with wrath and
Did straight upbraid

pomp beheld ,
embrace,
anger filled,
her to her face.

�</text>
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                <text>&lt;a title="University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks" href="http://special.lib.gla.ac.uk/chapbooks/search/"&gt;University of Glasgow Union Catalogue of Scottish Chapbooks&amp;nbsp;&lt;/a&gt;</text>
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